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This message has been edited. Last edited by: Pandora,

Oh, HB!!! ((((((HB))))))

It does sound like you are having quite the awful week and I am so sorry for you and your family. I'm glad your uncle is doing well, but how scary! Your anxiety levels have EVERY reason to be sky high! Thank God for the neighbor who came to help!

I wish there was something I could say or do, but there isn't. I'm sorry for the violence in your area and that it seems so out of control. I pray that you and your family will remain safe.

Also, I'm sorry that all of this coincides with the anniversary of your mother's death. That alone would be enough to deal with, but now this. I hope that you will find ways to honor her and grieve in the midst of the other chaos.

Keep posting, we're listening.

-CT

Hummingbird,

What an awful way to live for you! I pray you will remain safe and I am glad to hear your uncle will live. What a terrible trauma for him, your aunt and you. I have family in Papua New Guinea and it is not safe there either. They live in compounds and have been attacked and robbed several times...not as violently as your uncle experienced though. A friend of mine moved to London Ontario from South Africa....there is not the same level of danger here; it is relatively safe in my city with little fear of danger. My cousin also moved out of PNG with her kids to get them out of harms way about 10 years ago after her boy witnessed an atrocity on their front lawn. They are doing well now living in Woodstock Ontario and her boy has just finished training as a helicopter mechanic. Is moving out of S.A. something you and your family would/could consider? That is a thought .....as once you are settled elsewhere, it might really benefit your health.

I am sorry to hear that you've been dealing with an anniversary of your mom's passing. I have not lost my mom yet, but I know her time will come in the next several years....I have no idea how I will handle that and the years after she is gone. What hard things we are asked to live through in this life! I hope you have some people around to support you at this time. Please know you are in my thoughts and take gentle care of you.

Peace,

Karie

Hummbingbird

OMG!! That is incredible. I am so very sorry about your uncle. I don't see how that could not traumatize you as well. No wonder you are feeling so much anxiety. It's not like it's coming from no where. I mean you have actual scary things going on NOW. How do you stay safe? I mean I can only imagine day to day that you have nightmares about the potential violence that you could experience at any given time. Talk about living, breathing and eating PTSD.

And then your mom. I am so sorry you have to face that grief too. Do you ever just talk to her anyway? I am facing the end of both my parent's life right now. I cringe when I imagine my mom actually gone. I keep video taping her now so I can hear her and see her later. My heart absolutely goes out to you HB. I'd offer to talk to you on the phone but I live in the USA and I think there'd be quite the charge.

DO you see a therapist now?

Jo

Hi Hummingbird,

I'm glad you are feeling a little better. Safety is such a fundamental issue, at least for me, and with the anniversary of your mum's death on your mind too it must be very hard to deal with!

I think it's great you are looking for ways to deal with the violence, not wanting to shrink from it by moving away. But, speaking from experience, it's also important that you can find times and places you do feel safe in. I have decided to move at the end of summer, and until then will go away regularly so I can relearn what feeling safe actually means.

I hope your uncle and aunt are feeling better!

take care
sb

Hi HB,

I'm so sorry to hear about all of the things that are going on with and around you. I can only sit here and imagine having to live through and deal with fear on a daily basis. I commend you and your family for wanting to stay in your area to do something to invoke change. I'm glad that your uncle will heal physically, but sad that he and your aunt will have to live with this memory.

I'll include you and your family in my prayers at church this evening.

Be safe!

SO .. formally HollyBaby0