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This message has been edited. Last edited by: Caeti723,

Caeti, just want to let you know that I did read your post, but I didn't know really what to reply.
I mean, I could go on and on and on how I absolutely adore my therapist, how wonderful he is for me... how great and wonderful it is to be with him, and so on and so forth... I just felt like maybe I'd rather stop bragging that I have the most wonderful therapist on the world. (Ooops, I was supposed not to do that! )


But... I know that there were some quite painful stories about the love/transference and therapy experience in general told here before. It is not always a success story to share.

I mean that we still would love to hear your story, how it goes with you now. I hope being back with your therapist will take you to some good, happy places. Please don't feel discouraged by the silence on your thread. I'd love to hear how you are.

ooops, me too, Caeti. I didn't mean that to sound dismissive of what you wrote, I guess I was just trying to tell you why I wouldn't quite know how to write it. I am sorry.

BB

Hi Caeti,

I also read your post before you took it down, and am sorry if you felt discouraged by the responses (or lack thereof). I wonder if it had something to do with the fact that our feelings about our T's are SO frequently the topic of discussion on this board, that your question was just too BIG. There are a few very LONG threads on transference, for good reason!

There was one post I put up a while back that immediately came to mind, but I wasn't sure exactly what you were looking for, so I hesitated. My experience with my former T was very painful, and since the therapy with him ended, I have analyzed every detail to death, seeing each one as a piece of a jigsaw puzzle, trying to form a picture where they all fit. Just recently the pieces seemed to fall into place (as much as they can from my point of view, anyway) and so I don't mind sharing this post with you now. It is fairly "light-hearted" as Monte put it ( ). To read the post you can click here.

Please don't feel bad...I hope you come back to the discussion. Take care!

SG

Hi all!
I tried to delete this post but I wasn't able to on my end. How can I do this? I go to the edit/delete option but it only gives the edit option.

I took it down on my own... I realized what a silly thread it was! No worries.


Thanks

Hi, Caeti...thanks for coming back and posting something. That was big of you...I felt bad about what I wrote, and I really hope, I didn't hurt you or make you think that what you wrote was silly. It wasn't silly. More importantly, you aren't silly. Let us know, how are you doing in therapy, and in life these days? Are things a bit better, are you home now, how are things in general? I don't want to pry, so don't answer if you aren't comfy, but really do want to hear how you are doing...

BB

Hi everyone,
I feel bad that my thread is just sitting here as two little dots. It was my way of erasing what I wrote because I haven't a clue how to get this deleted. I tried to at least!

BB- Thanks for dropping your notes and checking up on me. I wasn't hurt at all by what you said-- it helped me put things in better perspective. I went ahead on a selfish limb (because I was doing what I think feels good to me as in writing on the transference issues in an amorous light) and I am glad you pointed this out to me. I only felt bad because I acted very selfish. And I apologize for that.

Not prying at all
I am doing better. The break up pain is finally letting up and I am out of this apartment in a month. The only thing is that he's taking the cat I am very attached to!

For therapy, well, I don't see my T for a long while and I've been trying to construct an email to him for the last few weeks in regards to the identity problems I have been having as of late. I just can't spit out the correct words, and that is heightened by it being an email {to him} . If you know what I mean. I am usually very good with words, it's just even by email I put extra pressure on myself if I know he will be setting his eyes onto it.

It just irks me! He's just a person.

Anyways, I am home and it feels good.

How are you?

Take care

Aw, Caeti...don't worry about deleting the thread. I know you can't bring your original post back, I'm not sure but I think you can change the subject heading if you those two little dots are bugging you. You could neame it hello or something that appeals to you? Just a sggestion.

I am so sorry to hear about your cat. That is really a tough one. But I am glad that you are able to get your own place soon, that will be easier on you, I'll bet. I'm impressed how you are able to handle things like a move, etc, on your own without seeing T for a long time. I would have really tough time with that. Why do you have to wait so long? I almost always have a month break between sessions, and I find it extremely difficult, but I can't really afford to do more than that.
I also totally relate to the email thing...I used to be the email queen of the universe with my T, and I would obsess about writing the perfect email to my T that would make him finally get what I was asking for. Finally he put the kibosh on me emailing him, by charging me an arm and a leg for every email that takes him longer than a minute to read. It's good because I kind of am forced to try and talk in session now, which he says is what I need to do, but now I feel no sense of connection to him or continuity between sessions, which is really, really hard. It makes me kind of pull in and forget about everything I'm supposed to be thinking aboutfor about a whole month, because I can't deal with it all on my own without the support, then open it back up again, then close it up again...you know what I mean?
Have you found any success keeping yourself connected and engaged to the counseling process in between such long breaks Caeti? Have you managed yet to talk about the stuff you needed to tell your T about? I am still struggling with that one, too.

BB