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MyShrink Crisis Counseling Psych Cafe Counseling Community Making Counseling Effective Forum General Discussion Questions about content on MyShrink and/or being in therapy. Hard Sessions
Psych Cafe Counseling Community Making Counseling Effective Forum General Discussion Questions about content on MyShrink and/or being in therapy. Hard SessionsPage 1 2
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What do you do to cope when you have had a hard session with your therapist? | ||
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I come here and pour out my heart and experience the warmth and understanding of some of the most wonderful people I know. Then I usually call my T. I know phone calls are not like sessions, but if you can figure out what you need from her that she can give you in a brief telephone call, I am sure she will be happy to do that. Even if it means setting up anothe session. If you want to talk about your session we are listening. JM | |||
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Summer, I think working out after session is a geat idea. I used to work out quite regularly and felt so much better then. But I can't say that I ever thought to dliberately work out after a session. I did call a friend once after a particularly grueling session and we met at a driving range and knocked the crap out of some golf balls.  | |||
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I like to write about the session. It seems that I can work through the issues rather well that way. <<<<<"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us...">>>>> | |||
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I bike up a really steep hill to get home (avoidable one), come home, walk the dog, journal about it, and then play a video game or somethin' if I'm still not calmer. | |||
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yeah i am a good writer here is something i wrote about my last session. The past abuse haunts me sleeping and awake. I came to you and you helped me to purge out the depths of my pain. Crying more on the inside, i wished for you to help me release all of it, I wished for you to be like a magic potion or wand, that you have told me doesnt exist. Why cant you see the thoughts that are invasive and take over my mind and concentration. Why do i sit there waiting for a mind reader. When you understand, the isolation that intrudes, flees. Thas all i have written so far. what do you think?? this is my work i wrote it myself. | |||
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Sounds great Emerald, I like how you express with your emotions. I do some of my best writing that way rather than when I intellectualize everything and end up sounding more like a psychobabbling book. I think being able to write or express your emotional side of an experience is far more therapeutic. It really sounds soulful.  I hope you are feeling a little more calm today. JM | |||
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Hi JM.... I just had to chuckle a little at this characterization. I can so relate. But I think I would have to add an r to book. I am a psychobabbling brook. I keep those "run on" sentences running on. I find myself full of gallows humor right now...nothing is going quite right for me...and all I can do is find something funny to keep me feeling anything. I do not mean to annoy or make light of everything. It certainly is not reflective of my current situation. But we do say funny things sometimes. eh? SD ~If you don't go in...you can't find out...~ | |||
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Oh SD, I can totally relate to finding anything funny just to keep feeling something or to provide relief from something too painful. Sometimes I truly believe that if it weren't for humor I'd be dead... deceased, void of life, bleedin demised, off the twig, kicked the bucket, pushing up daisies,... an ex-parrot! So I get humor. | |||
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I have a long ride home from where my T is, so I usually think and sob quite a bit while listening to music. I'm usually in no shape to do much else. Russ ---------------------------------- "May the good Lord shine a light on you, Warm like the evening sun." -Keith Richards | |||
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Hi Russ... I can relate to you too. There isn't much laughing for me post session, but I don't cry either. I wish I could do it your way. Crying is good...it's exhausting...but cleansing too. I have a long ride home also...it gives me time to process things a bit...and leave my T a voicemail about what I've processed. She seems to like those. I wish I could get the sobbing part over but I just can't seem to really feel my pain right now. hmmmm... I'm beginning to wonder how much pain I can tolerate before I cry. (This is where SI becomes a risk for me.) I can laugh...even about my pain...but because I can't cry, I feel a little crazy when I laugh. SD ~If you don't go in...you can't find out...~ | |||
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I can cry but once I start I have a hard time stopping and it doesn't ever seem to help really - I don't feel better or cleansed afterward, just really dehydrated and tired. My marriage counselor T told me that this kind of crying means that doing it alone isn't enough, I need to have a witness and support for the grief. Who is going to want to do that? Sure my T would but I pay her way too much for a way too short of an appointment to spend that much of it crying. | |||
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SD, can you tell me what "SI" refers to? I think crying is good, too, but - as River says - sometimes crying alone won't make me feel better. But, if nothing else, I see crying as a sign that at least I'm not numb, even if I don't know what exactly I'm crying about. Thanks, Russ ---------------------------------- "May the good Lord shine a light on you, Warm like the evening sun." -Keith Richards | |||
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River, Funny you should mention that. From my experience just this week sharing your wide open emotions in front of your T is worth every cent. It pays off every single session it took to get to that point. Yesterday I cired and sobbed audibly, even made the painful ugly faces and all, and this was remarkably different than when I've cried this way alone. Alone I feel just as you described; exhausted, and I get a headache and sometimes dizzy. While crying alone can be cleansing, I think when we are grieving such heavy emotions it doesn't have that affect. It's as satisfying as playing catch with yourself. However, when your T is there to catch every tear drop, and hear every painful groan you mutter, and when you catch site of her deep care and love for you through her warm piercing eyes, the grief is heard in a way it has never been heard before even by you. It is powerfully enriching to the soul because it was contained by someone who loves you unlike any other. Just when I thought I could not feel closer to my T and more assured of her love for me, this happened and I am convinced this is the key to true healing because we find that we are able to speak without words and our T's are fluent in understanding this language. That's my very recent experience anyway. | |||
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Wow, JM. I think I need to start doing this. I mean, I cry in my sessions, but perhaps I need to really let it out. I am still really hesitant to make any real emotional, transference-like connection with my T, but I think it might be time.
Oh man, that's priceless. Russ ---------------------------------- "May the good Lord shine a light on you, Warm like the evening sun." -Keith Richards | |||
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