That's another great idea. I haven't gotten to read a book for fun in quite a while, because I am a sit down and read for hours type of reader and Boo never gives me that luxury. I feel the sudden need to visit a bookstore! I'm a little bit proud of me, but also still freaked out, because so far the whole boundaries thing hasn't been such an easy ride. Who would have thought, LOL!Read More...

Yep. I know what you mean. I've gotten myself into quite the pickle in this situation. It's been 16 years since my first T left (literally, moved out of the country) and I still have fleeting moments of longing for her. I was a lost teen who had been seeing her for a year and a half, and while I didn't feel attached then, once she was gone, I was heartbroken. I often searched to see if she was back in town and practicing again, but after 5 years of no luck, I had to find a new T. While I...Read More...

SG, You are a very loving person to have ached like that for your daughter and to have made the effort to protect her. The way it ended up surely must be an example of good karma that deservedly came your way.Read More...

Thanks to all of you. I still feel dumb but that's ok. We talked a little about how I am feeling and I said I'm not happy. She asked me if I thought I was that bad. I said not bad but just not happy. She asked if I wished I could feel happier and I said yes. I just don't see it happening. I keep telling myself that I have no real reason to be unhappy. I have a pretty good life and I should be happy. I'm just not. I just feel down most of the time. I don't really care what happens. I don't...Read More...

DF, it sounds to me like it means you don't feel safe as far as confidentiality or anonymity goes. Or perhaps the safety feeling is related to things you have told DBT T about your ex that seem like too much info to have shared? Is that possible?Read More...

Retrogal, LG and Justmaybe, Glad you liked it. Retrogal, your story is so inspiring. I hope I can get to where you are one day. I'm glad you finally feel free to be yourself. Justmaybe, I'm glad it fills you with some glimmer of hope. Take care of yourself as you wade through that stuff with your T.Read More...

((((Draggles)))) pcd thank you and heaps of s and lots of love to you and your inner family and your outer family! Here always! M xxRead More...

((((Draggers)))) thanks for the hugs and well-wishes!Read More...

Neither do i!!!!Read More...

Ok, so i am back to get some honest feedback about this situation. Last night, the counselor concluded that a panic attack which is the result of my husband's PTSD is what caused his rage the other day. Her solution is that he needs to see the dr again and discuss his anti-anxiety meds again... which I took away and hid, because he was overdosing on these and then drinking on top of that. He has real trust issues with psychologists and psychiatrists etc... so... this makes me feel like the...Read More...

Beautiful songs, Draggers! The One by Gary Allan: No rush though I need your touch I won't rush your heart Until you feel on solid ground Until your strength is found, girl I'll fill those canyons in your soul Like a river lead you home And I'll walk a step behind In the shadows so you shine Just ask it will be done And I will prove my love Until you're sure that I'm "the one" Somebody else was here before He treated you unkind And broken wings need time to heal Before a heart can fly, girl...Read More...

I never really did the processing you guys do with my T, cause I don't have a lot of invasive memories or anything- but I remember distinctly the sensation of being sooooo sleepy in response to...what? I have no idea. It happened at times with my SD too. Like instantly- just a very strong desire to fall asleep. strange. I also have the supermarket zombie disease. haha, I avoid shopping because it is inevitable, and my H won't even *let* me go in alone anymore, because I will be found...Read More...

kick stuff really hard! Kicking works for me when my anger, which My T and now a new T I've seen a few times too, seem to think is turned inwards- comes out now and then. I have an old dryer in my back room that I kick really hard every once in awhile when it comes out. Cushions didn't work for me cause for some reason I need to hear a loud noise, or see a result (something denting, for example) Works cause it is harmless and no one gets hurt with my mean words that I want to say or mean...Read More...

(((Draggers))) (((BB))) Well, I had to text my T yesterday, but only to let him know he had SPAM (my emails have been going into his SPAM folder for some reason, so he likes me to warn him when a journal entry gets sent), to find out whether my session was Monday or Tuesday (Tuesday) and to remind him that if he and H are going to talk about my stuff, I expect to be invited. Other than that, I haven't texted at all and feel good about it. I was actually annoyed I had to text him for the...Read More...

Hi BI, My T also recommended that I see a nutritionist, and I went to the person she recommended (who is also a registered dietitian - very important!) I have found the nutritionist very helpful, actually, and I was surprised by that. I figured it would be a few appointments on learning how to better plan for meals and learning how to balance what I eat. Instead, I'm going on my third month with the nutritionist, and while I'm learning a lot, I still have a lot to learn The nutritionist I...Read More...

There's no such thing as a pointless update Frosty! Thanks for catching us up with how things are going. Sounds like you've got some good goals and are moving forward. Good progress! Keep us posted! ((((Frosty))))Read More...

Oh BI - You and I are sailing on the same ship right now. I too have gotten that kind of response from my T. My T is currently is vacation, and we left things on a very harsh note, and it's just crushing me. So I do know, take is easy. GGRead More...

Thanks Liese, Broken Illusions, Draggers, STRM, and TN. I'm writing on my phone. I'm away for a beautiful weekend And I'm remembering my friend. I'm sad but in a way I'm at Peace with the sadnessRead More...

So, it looks like I might be in for the long haul. LOL! Well, that's okay with me. I am just scared T will start pushing me out sooner or something. I have a lot of issues in my past that we need to work through, and our main issue of working through this attachment this is primary right now.. since I find myself attaching to strong older female role models. I think it's because my mother was such a weak figure in my life that I do this. BUT, I'd be okay with paying T forever to play that ...Read More...

Thank you yaku My t thinks I'm a joke or nothing I saw has any meaning. Shenever called too. I trusted her. I worked so hard to do so. The pain is so bad I find myself wanting to be drunk.Read More...

Oh, I am smiling now so its okay. Cuz I went away for awhile to take the kids to a parade and then I've been working on my homework. And then, pleasant surprise, when I found my way back here just now there are some very nice replies from my friends Deepfried and STRM. And I think all I needed (for this go-around, anyway) besides being able to air the conflict, was to be understood. So thanks, guys!Read More...

GG DF YAKU Thanks you guys. I'm glad I'm not alone in this. I too still have to put gas in my car and that is enough to make me broke right there. I still have to buy my cigs too. Sheesh! It just doesn't end. I hope things get better for you folks too! GG - Wipe your ASS ROTFLMAO pretty funny! Even though I know it really isn't. Thanks for reminding me.Read More...

Thank you, DragonFly, for your kind words in regards to my poetry. I love writing. It makes me feel happy. It's one of my many releases. I will be open to sharing more with you all in the future. As far as the name thing, I am not sure if I feel spacey. It seems to trigger some type of anxiety in me for some reason, though. I noticed it today when a customer looked at my name tag and said my name a few times in our interaction. I was like "WOAH..." I am interested in my next session to see...Read More...