This is an interesting thread and I'm glad I found it. For a while, I assumed the way my T was (when I cried) was 'normal' and as time passed and I saw other T's, I realized it wasn't ... however it was very much what I needed at that time - and still often need/want. One of my T's, the current one, will just sit with me while I cry. She won't say anything until I'm done talking ... she'll pass me a tissue if I'm not close to one, etc. However my last T, the one I was talking about above -...Read More...

Frog, I a glad that your session with T went so well. I thought it was so interesting what wrote about not wanting to come out of the transference. Can you say more about that, what you mean, etc.?Read More...

Hi Rock Ah yes, my zigzagging logic often needs extra explanation. I am actually saying none of the above. What i am saying is that if your struggle with your T matches the troubles you are having in other areas of your life and IF you can find a way to get past the surface discomfort / conflicts with her and work on the underlying pattern of struggling to trust, it could be very beneficial for you. You are already struggling to trust her and feeling manipulated so it is all there, in the...Read More...

Thank you , Jones, Draggers, Morgs, starfish, Blanket Girl, AG, and Da Rock. I appreciate such a warm reception. Yes, Da Rock, I finally got the message my back was trying to clue me in on! Although I'm sure I could go the SSI route I just can't see myself going that road.. Events that have led me here have taken their toll on me and I feel compelled to tell my story. I'm thinking maybe go backwards and out of synch... As a kid I didn't have a father around to provide any type of guidance...Read More...

Hi Incognito, All I can say is that your last post was so emotionally vulnerable and beautiful and real to me that tears were streaming down my cheeks as I was reading it. I particularly related to your desire to connect with him and prevent it from burning him out. I too have been feeling that same way with my T. I have been seeing him twice a week lately. But often times I just wish I could touch base with him every day in some kind of small way. I'm overwhelmed by my need to be so near to...Read More...

Morgs I hope today's session was ok after that seemingly endless break for you. Also thoughts for you as the people in your country experience such dreadful floods, the devastation is so immense. Do let us know how it went today, starfishRead More...

TN So pleased to hear the ever steady, unfased reaction from newT. He sounds a really solid guy and is the very things yoou need at the moment - reliable and constant. The deeper connecting stuff will come in time, but after your dreadful disruption with your oldT, the greatest gift he has for you right now is consistency and a listening ear. I am really pleased starfishRead More...

So nice of you Liese to reply. I am doing okay and resting and walking and swimming and doing lots of yoga. I am well bonded to sweetP now, i feel I can tell him anything and that I can be all parts of me there and he is not only fine with that, he is gentle and caring. It makes all the difference. I find the gaps hard again but I can sort of feel his kindness in my head for nearly three days after a session so that is good. I find that I have a lot of memories and stuff coming up. much love...Read More...

hi kashley and deepfried - thank you very much for reading and for your responses. they helped. i'll respond to them soon. my head is spinning. i called my aunt w my regular T yesterday. i got her voicemail. i asked my aunt to please not email me again, i don't do email with family. I had said that on email too - and she responded "why? it's not like there are gvernment secrets." i did not explain why. (they are mean on email and not in public or even on the phone.) i asked if i could be...Read More...

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I also wanted to say congratulations. Keeping some emotional distance from a toxic parent is a process. Be proud you managed today but it probably won't be the last time she challenges you if she is anything like my mother. HugsRead More...

I do not have a P, but I do have two Ts and they communicate occasionally with one another. I also have a medical doctor that they both speak with.Read More...

AG, Sorry for the late check-in. My best to you. I hope you continue to move to getting healthy again. RussRead More...

Frosty, This is going to be a quick suggestion because I'm off to T, but have you tried taking probiotics? I have had issues with IBS and it is definitely stress/anxiety related and taking probiotics really helped get it under control. Just a thought.Read More...

Interesting theory, Draggers! I think you might be on to something. Our environment truly is a reflection of ourselves.Read More...

Liese, kashley, STRM ~ thank you so much. it helped me to just get this out. it's been a rouh night and i' m sad about my family. your support and kindness helps a lot. thank you.Read More...

DF Ooops, I am so sorry i didn't respond to you on this thread earlier. I replied to LG and then posted a reply which i realised was for the wrong thread and after i moved it i forgot to come back. I really am sorry, it was incredibly rude especially as you were having such a hard time. PanRead More...

Hi Quilter, no I haven't tried a drink before a session. Well my session is at twelve noon, so .... others on the forum have talked about having a few drinks and then going to a session. In my younger days I could have done it!!!! Tell me if you try it. Are you having trouble opening up too????? Tell me about your quilts! STRM, Thanks for encouraging me!! I really appreciate it. I also thought maybe I could bring sunglasses for both t and I. Maybe that would make us laugh. Maybe he and I...Read More...

Thank you so much for your support Liese! It really means alot I finished with my T or should I say she finsihed with me last October. Now I can't afford another T hence am going it alone. Am currently in the phase of thinking why the hell would I want to rely on anyone else again so maybe not having any money is a blessing in disguise ButterflyRead More...

Yes!! Walking in the door to the office there is an amazing, calming scent. It almost smells like a really clean, natural soap smell- like a child's shampoo or something. I really like it and always try to smell my coat afterward, hoping it took on some of the smell.Read More...

Thanks for the heads up! I'm safe!Read More...

Getting angry works great for me. I just launch into it. This is the easy stuff for me. Talking about my life is harder. But I understand that is different from your experience. What if you started off by saying something like ive been thinking about our relationship together and i would like to talk about bla bla. sometimes, if you are really deliberate, it allows you to be more tolerant of the discomfort. thats how it can be for me. its like if i spell out what im about to do, out loud, it...Read More...

HI Firefly, "I guess now I've learned that I've grown really dependent on her, which totally sucks. I don't know how to get close to someone without going overboard." Oh, gosh, Firefly, I could have written that myself. I've been seeing my T for 3 years, been denying the importance the relationship has had for me for most of it until recently, until I, too, realized how utterly dependent and attached I am. And, I still don't trust him. I need him but don't trust him. Explain that one to me.Read More...

Hi BG, Sounds like your Mom is throwing a tantrum. So hard to stand back and just let her throw it. I've cowtowed to my mother's anger for years. She's not as histrionic as your mom but anger is anger and withdrawing love from a child is withdrawing love. Recently, my poor dying brother informed me that it was my fault that my Dad died alone in the hospital. My mother told me it wasn't nice that he said it but basically said she was too overwhelmed to deal with it. So, again, for the ten...Read More...