Thank you for the warm welcome BW. And just so you know, I think that everyone has insight...whether they have experience in the topic presented or not...don't sell yourself short.Read More...

Very cool. I think that this is what mature love looks like. When we don't need to mold the person into what we want because what they do is not a reflection of us. Of course this is easier said then done and takes tremedous ego strength. I can look back now and see how I have lost a few of my relationships this way, by holding on too tight.Read More...

Thank you for the info Shrinklady I don't feel so bad about having trouble with this search now. Unfortunately, the site you list is pretty much for the wrong side of the continent I will definitely be attending your webinar! Thanks again,Read More...

I know there are alot of counseling places out there, but i just want to share with this community what has made all the difference for my family and that is inhome family counseling, plus life coaching. I ran into a company called Harmony Crisis Management Group. www.harmonycmg.com and they have counselors around the country. I'm sure if you mention my name they know who i am bc i have thanked them so much. They sent a counselor into my home as opposed to having to go to an office and it...Read More...

Well I worked so hard with my T yesterday. And it was one of the most wonderful sessions we've had. I refused to let my guard come up, so it left me very exposed, but I also got so much more out of it than i normally do. I told my T about last time, where the defensiveness came from, and she immediately apologised (which wasn't necessary - I know she didn't mean to hurt me). She didn't even realise it was so touchy for me and how could she when I didn't tell her and when I didn't react. I...Read More...

HB, In my busyness I just read your post. Isn't this what it's all about?? Sounds like you've been becoming your own Self....equal and valid and whole. This is why therapy is so exciting! It's about maturing and it's awesome that we can find that opportunity after our childhood/teenage years. I loved reading about your progress. Hope you have a marvelous day. KarieRead More...

LTF - Don't feel bad if you need to close your eyes. If it helps you to get better, then do it. I'm sure your P will be just fine with it. I've asked my P to turn around in his chair, so that I saw his back. We were talking like that ! LOL I also felt childish and like we were playing a game. It was embarrassing, but it helped me to open up and express what I needed to!Read More...

That's an important one too AG, thanks! I started reading "reinventing your life" today which is a less technical book about schema therapy. Mistrust/abuse is the schema i am most bothered with at the moment. And it lists ways it can show in relationships. I found it quite eye-opening so thought I might share: I can see many of these things in my life and this makes me more aware of them so i can try to tackle them one by one. LTFRead More...

It's so hard to see someone you love die. I'm sorry man. I think that the best you can do ius really be with him where he is at. It seems that he has reached the point of acceptance, which is a hard stage for most close friends and family members to accept. The best thing you can do is sit there, wtch tv, laugh, and if he wants talk about what is happening to him. Also, take care fo yourself. I have not had someone as close as a parent pass yet...so I am lucky. I don't even know how I would...Read More...

I think I've known one guy who's gone to therapy, but I know many who really should be going.Read More...

As a male I can tell you that you are not being "too female." Nor is he being "too male." There seem to be some big issues here that need resolving. One, why can't he see or tell you that this was a dangerous path to take. It is very common in marriages with children for partners to lose that spark. I know I experienced the same thing with my wife. It feels good to hae attention from atractive women. You can love your wife, and tell yourself you would never cheat, but it can happen, and is...Read More...

DBT is not only group but also individual therapy. If you you put much weight in research it has been prove to be the most effective therapy for BPD. That being said...it doesn't mean it will be right for you. You need to do what works. There are parts of DBT which I love and others I could do without. It does, however, provide a good base of learning your emotions and how to not let them rule your life. I would also say that BPD is a label that gets thrown around alot. Do not let yourself...Read More...

Usually when you fel like it's time to end therapy is a good time to really explore why you feel that way. It is a good time to examine how this pattern of becoming able to be close and wanting to leave is like the other relationships in your life.Read More...

Hi HB..... I bet your assumption is right on for most people, obviously is for me anyway. Thanks for your reply. Hope you're doing well? I'm glad, real glad to be settling in here. My mom and dad came to visit today. They are frail...my dad nearly died last year, had heart surgery then a stroke. I guess I don't need to say he is not the same. Attachment stuff and my love for them is tugging at me tonight. Ahh....somedays I wish I didn't have feelings.Read More...

Thank you for posting this. I honestly thought I was the only one in the world that went through this agony waiting for mail. It is comforting to know I am not alone.Read More...

I read your post and you were thinking that I think you are my counselor who is pretending to be someone else??? wow, that's very dangerous assumption LTF no no no …Read More...

cera, It sounds like you are in pain and suffering from a good amount of anxiety and stress - trying to handle all of this alone is not a good idea. Calling your P would be a really, really good idea I think. I've been through lows like this and have been so tempted to drink or anything to feel different because feeling better seemed impossible and feeling anything different would have been better. I found though that trying to do it all by myself never worked because I would get too caught...Read More...

Hi CT, I will miss your posts alot! and like AG said, I've really appreciated your insight and honesty as well! Good Luck to you and I wish you the best! mlcRead More...

Hi Robin, Massage therapy sounds a lot better than regular therapy. I really hope it helps with your headaches. I've only had a massage a few times, but I must say, you really do feel wonderful afterwards. AGRead More...

Thank you guys for thinking of me This week has been really rough, but I'm doing better. I saw my T this morning and talked about how angry I was at him and frustrated with how hard he was on me Monday. I told him I'd been thinking about this lolcat - and changing the caption to: "Don't u 'nice therapist' me - u no longer hab a nice therapist" He asked if I was talking about him no longer being a nice therapist or me no longer being a nice patient. Heh, I told him it worked both ways I...Read More...

I think that too, that is, it is mighty powerful! yet sometimes I wonder if we are going to figure when to stop. And it's migihty expensive. And we're broke. Why doesn't insurance or anything pay for it when it's essential for some us? Like we have a dx and all but noone will still pay for it. SamyRead More...

Hi Luna, I just wanted to say welcome to the site, sorry not to say it sooner, life was a little overwhelming this past week and I'm way behind in the posting. I'll chime in with everyone else's comments and tell you this is an amazing place with incredibly supportive, and wise, people. I'm looking forward to getting to know you. AGRead More...

Hi MLC, i feel the same way sometimes too, though probably not as much as I used to. It's really unnerving, feeling yourself go from a high-functioning adult to a scared little child as soon as you sit in your T's office... that's how it was for me. And I got angry with myself for feeling so childish around her. I felt pathetic. It's a good idea to talk to your T about it. Maybe you could write about it too, and take it just in case you can't find the words while you're there? WAI - i love...Read More...