For about fourteen months I was angry with my counsellor. Outside of my session I was constantly cursing her and in turn it caused erotic fantasies! I had painfully written down my problem/actions and feebly attempted to discuss it with her after many months, my counsellor ‘normalised my actions’ and moved on, she shut me down. I’ll not broach that subject with her again and I am positive she’ll never broach it with me but it’s still a problem for me. She doesn’t like me (I know because I...Read More...

Melba Thank you for your reply...I can relate to the 'buried deeply' part. I know it takes time, but I hope I am able to do the same as you have done. All the best. TN: Thank you What you said about hiding...maybe she is in hiding due to the fall out. I am glad you have such a great rapport with your T. I think it is wonderful. Truly. All the best. T.Read More...

I talked to the County Attorney. I still have time...Read More...

oh,yeah ((((Draggers)))) it does, too matter. i saw what you wrote, too, but couldn't respond cuz i was at work. i have also done that same thing and then was equally hard on myself, but it's not helpful at all to do that. it's okay. sometimes T talks way more than i do! be gentle to you, cuz i like you!Read More...

It doesn't sound insane at all, BLT. Why not sound her out and see what she thinks?Read More...

((TN)) thank you for the belated birthday wishes. Sounds like you got a tremendous gift with old T (a hug) and one I suspect I can only dream about. ((AG)) thank you, i'm glad our paths have crossed too your blog led me here so thank you for opening me to the wonderful world and group at psychcafeRead More...

*nods* showing vulnerability is a massive thing for me also. Despite rationally 'getting' that my T is a safe person, all my protective stuff screams at me on a regular basis that to show vulnerability means handing someone a weapon with which they can hurt me - and why would I be stupid enough to do that?! She has said that being in T with me has been like being very subtly tested. When I heard that I was, like, OMG I've been rumbled. Run, Run! Because it was absolutely true. I had been...Read More...

In Transition, I like what you wrote. I think I should write that down and read it over and over each day.Read More...

I read this earlier today and have thought about it a lot. I am not sure it is a sign you are supposed to recognise - but it is something. A strange coincidence? - but it keeps happening. Take whatever meaning from it as you think you should, but I firmly believe it is a sign from C, I really do. We are all creatures of the universe and we all affect each other - I think this butterfly is visiting you for a reason.Read More...

I'm glad it serves, Muff.Read More...

Very good question Kid, and good discussion. It has made me think. I think it´s right trust comes in different levels. I think I had to reach a very high level of trust in old T before I could let my inner child emerge. It took very long time, and maybe I was too scared to trust at first. Maybe because I had no one to trust in when I was a child and was neglected, hurt and abused. I have worked with many therapists and with them I didn´t really make any progress. OldT was the first I could...Read More...

too! Li'l one just wants her to fill so many voids that the adult kid knows she can't. I know she can never replace what I've lost but the longing feelings are still so overwhelming. I hate this. The Kid and li'l oneRead More...

One wonders how many mental and emotional conditions can be successfully treated with human kindness, instead of labeling, medicating and institutionalizing US.Read More...

spontenaity is the spice of life! what's a "hot grilled breaky"? a breakfast sandwich? just curious. at any rate, sounds marvelous, muff. me thinks you and bessy have the right idea about lifeRead More...

sure as shit! i'd buy!Read More...

i was talking, tongue in cheek, abouot size, not the idea of being USA citizen. being affiliated with the USA is not in the least offensive to me. i could write a ton here on that, but it would be controversial for sure, so we'll just leave it alone. (((RM))) that is a beautiful image, by the way. party on!Read More...

Hi BLT, I think that Draggers made a good point. It sounds like T was working as a one off , just keeping in touch session and was trying to keep it light. Good luck next session.Read More...

Hi Draggers...because I do want to share more about my experience, I will write something about it this weekend, when I have more time to get it out. Just wanted to let you know.... The KidRead More...

GE, Draggers, TN, Noners, CD - thank you so much. Your words helped. I don't know what to do right now. There is a plug where my heart should be. I feel I'm walking in a waking dream all day long. Thank you for all the reminders that I will get through this T tried... so hard today. She asked me to look at her, she said it would be connecting. I didn't want her looking back at me... that she'd see I have nothing in there. But I did, and she was teary and so I didn't anymore. She held my...Read More...

that sounds rather nice, muff. i hope you go through with it and do indeed end up with what you're hoping for.Read More...

So that is the first time in 27 years you have expressed anger at your T?!? I am not a T (yet) but if I were, and I had a client who had been seeing me for multiple years without ever expressing anger about anything I did (and when you've been in therapy for years, any T will mess up enough to merit some kind of anger), I would be ECSTATIC to see my client get angry at me finally! It sounds like you may have an issue with being overly compliant and not expressing anger, so she should have...Read More...

Hey anon, Sorry it's taken me a little while to get back with you. I've taken Unisom nightly for weeks at a time, not specifically for sleep but actually "off label" to help control hyperemesis during pregancy-- with my dr.'s full knowledge and approval, of course. Apparently it's pretty widely used that way. Anyway, it has to be pretty safe if they let you use it when pregnant. She also told me you can't get addicted to it. First time I took it it *really* knocked me out. I think I slept...Read More...

What you offer???? A warm, strong voice of reason, care, compassion, giving good advice and direction. I always learn from you.Read More...

Oh Cat - I know what you mean. I'm always wondering and afraid of what other peole think. I believe I have to be a step above so no one can ever say anything bad about me. Sick I know. But it is scary when you think people are always judging you. I know that most times they aren't but it doesn't make it any easier.Read More...

Totally understand RT. Don't worry - everyone here is just wonderful!Read More...