Under surely!!!Read More...

Sheesh about your counselor, Scars! Unfortunately it sounds like contacting him would hit a wall again. You could try it, but how would you feel if he reacted the same way he did to your text?? Personally I would feel rejected. But that doesn't mean I could stop myself from contacting him.Read More...

Re: Please don't get drawn into another war of words.Read More...

Sorry I didn't respond to anyone sooner, I got this crazy one-hit-wonder of a flu and slept forever. My P suggested some med changes I could do (I just got my generic switched back to the original manufacturer (which they changed again on me unexpectedly) so, I'm sure that will fix it. I don't know how I feel yet on account of being so sick but I hope maybe the past week I've just had some weird flu and am now better... I ended up in the most severe abdominal pain I've ever been in on Friday...Read More...

It's not a very comfortable path is it? And it wasn't a path chosen by me either. But, there you go, such is therapy, and life!Read More...

This is water: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzX9IFS732gRead More...

I honestly don't understand how anything on this forum could lead to threatening someone's life. That's pretty scary stuff.Read More...

unless you very strongly suspect that this person you're considering sharing information with could figure out who you are, i wouldn't worry about it. it's a pretty damn big world. OTOH, if you know the approximate locale of said person and know that you're locale was approximate to said-person's locale, that may be a different story. as an example, from a previous post you started, i know you are from the midwest. i am from the midwest. you happen to remind me of somebody. it is highly...Read More...

scars, I think psychoanalysts are safest as they are trained specifically for attachment issues, especially transference. bpd is primarily from attachment failure, imo. i have those issues too. I only feel safe with analysts and not other Ts because they are required to do depth therapy for years and be fit to be therapists. I don't know other types of therapists who get that litmus test. although some other types of Ts have done/do that type of work. just fyi DBT might be better for some...Read More...

(((ANON))) I hardly see you as a selfish person but if that's the way you want to see yourself, as less than perfect but still loveable, then I don't want to mess with that. Of course it's okay that your best is not always enough. But I have a feeling that you work really hard almost all the time, if not all the time and that is "enough" for me.Read More...

(((((Poppet))))) xRead More...

Hello Everyone, I'm reposting this here in case, it was missed elsewhere. Just to clarify, I am the only one who has the decision making authority to ban someone from the forum. I always offer an explanation for the decision to the individual. If someone is banned and wishes to return, I first need to chat with them to clarify any outstanding issues related to that decision. If we are able to come to some agreement then the individual can return. However, if I feel it would not be in their...Read More...

(((RT)))thanks for sharing that. that is really pretty much what i'm realizing in my life at the present moment. depression on it's own is such a struggle, but then you pretty much have to add to that mix self-isolation, because the last thing you want to do when you're in a depression is connect with others. which of course, leads to deeper depression and hopelessness. it IS up to us to connect with others when we are down, but the shame is that it can be extremely difficult to do so in the...Read More...

(((hugs))) About your original post on T snapping.... I would have felt the same way (a bit hurt thinking about it later). I have done this many times with my former therapist and my new therapist. A few weeks ago my new T started off my session by asking how I was doing, of course. I said something about being stressed out because I literally had just finished an exam and handed it in (for T training school). I had just spent hours on my computer working on my take home exam that was about...Read More...

aww mudd, thank you!! very sweet of you! it was a while ago now but its so nice to be reminded!! and sorry i was late to reply, had a hard week at work and only popped in to the forum now. we're doing ok. i find that once you are married there are more expectations (of each other, of yourself etc) and i'm trying to manage those worries and keep our relationship real and connected. and (if nothing else) i do know how i like my eggs thank you for reminding me of our happy day i hope you're...Read More...

R2G - I think reading what you wrote out to her was so incredibly close to saying I love you - in fact yours was better because you could qualify it. OMG. I was reading this and replying when my T text me. And I think it was because of this thread as I had been thinking about loving T so I text back (she leaves tonight on a long vacation) and I said 'don't forget that I love you and I will miss you'. I am not sure I have ever said it that directly myself. But I did it. SomedaysRead More...

(((Poppet)))Read More...

I totally get the food thing Anon, I'm extremely uncomfortable eating in front of other people than family. I have to talk myself into it. Now a bottle of wine? I'm all over that! Yes! I know Id take in my Pdoc I see right now bec I wont see him again & willing to take big chances like that bec I know I can run far away. The only thing I can think of is like having an affair in a foreign country or a person you barely know bec I know I wont ever see them again. So I like to take those...Read More...

Melatonin Yep - Nightmares - gorey ones. I still woke up at 1 and 3 and 4. But I will say it made me so sleepy that I went back to sleep really easily. I just really didn't want to close my eyes again after that 3 am nightmare. I feel a little off this morning. Sort of dizzy and still tired. That may be because my ED has kept me from eating more than a few tablespoons of food for the last few days. I think I'll wait a few days and maybe try it again. JillannRead More...

((((RabbitEars)))) thanksRead More...

I had two terribly sad dreams last night. First let me say I had the most intense t session on Friday. I was finally able to talk to t about something that I am so ashamed about. So that has my head spinning currently. I had been in therapy 20 years ago and have just returned about two months ago. In my first dream my current t was telling me she was going to have to terminate me because she had to move away. I woke up so scared that I called her office phone just to hear her voice. In the...Read More...

i've done one yesterday, and one today. and also two the day before. becca - i think that is so neat what your niece's husband is doing (don't you wish there was a family word for that? nephew in law? lol I don't know!!). it's amazing how one person can inspire others. i know when someone does a random nice thing for me i'm deeply grateful, and i'm grateful when I can do something. poppet - it's a great concept. have you seen the movie titled the same? (paying it forward) R2G - I'm glad you...Read More...