I have been putting this question to myself a lot lately. So far the answer I feel most in tune with goes like this: I am in a process of individuating, integrating (because I feel like a fragmented mess), and healing. This would be going on in someway with or without T because it seems to be what life is asking of me, but talking with her each week facilitates the process, and provides containment and grounding when necessary. P.S. Yeah, I think counselling can become a habit. An expensive...Read More...

CD, that's what i am doing at the moment. thinking of you.Read More...

I obviously have too much time on my hands, but was thinking of summertime memories *Watermelon & home made pop cycles. *Freezing veges from garden. Was a huge process. *Walking barefoot on blk top to get to the community pool when no siblings would carry me. Oww oww Oww! *Fresh black raspberry pie! & the chigger bites to proove it. *Making ice cream. Geez that took forever! *Hanging my hand out the car window to try & catch the long grass as we drove by it. *Bridge jumping w/o...Read More...

Hi RT, My cats have saved my life... both of them I brought in to my life at different times. Since I have been home from the hospital their support and entertainment has meant the world. I really want to work with animals... even though it makes me sad too [and sorry about your ETC treatments, I'm sure those were very difficult!] but I have such an amazing heartfelt bond with them (animals) I can't see anything else my heart could go toward. I also want to meet different people... I think...Read More...

(((everyone))) Happy Mother's Day to you all.Read More...

yeah, i do think it's a really good metaphor. i'm pleased it's clicking with others here, and thanks for saying so. (((fishy))) i'm afraid my soil isn't quite there, either. it's okay, though. we're working on it. i haven't been to therapy for nearly 6 months now. i'm getting close to returning. gonna have to talk about money, though. money's a big trigger for me, so that won't be much fun. therapy: a true love/hate relationship!Read More...

I am shy and gentle, like a wild rabbit. I am small and quick to dart away I freeze when I'm really scared. I have good hearing and prefer listening to speaking. I have to listen well, because I am afraid to look. But when I'm really scared, I cannot make sense of the words T is saying.Read More...

((RT)) I essentially just did kind of what you're talking about. I talked to T about giving up, depressing stuff, etc., etc. My T asked before I left if I was going to kill myself, and I said no. So if I were to end up doing that, she did do what she ethically should have done, given my history with that kind of thing, and I don't think her ethical boundaries stretch to getting in touch with me to make sure that I still will not do anything.Read More...

Ooh Turtle, thank you for bringing this thread back up. Not sure where I got this but it's something along the lines of "behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out". It has become something of a mantra of mine!Read More...

“Never attribute to malevolence what is merely due to incompetence” ― Arthur C. Clarke, 3001: The Final OdysseyRead More...

Red Tomato, I have noticed how wise you are and helpful. You answer and give great things to think about so I hope you won't go away again. You answer way more than I do...I'm just too caught up and wish I was better. What I'm saying is you're very valuable to myself and others and it's great to feed the human connection...this is where people do understand each other. HopefulRead More...

i'm not biased but i think we're an awesome group of people (((turtle))) if anything was lost, i don't think i suffer any more than anybody here. i have been here longer than you, but time isn't necessarily the measuring cup of what makes up a "steady" friendship. i could write a book on how to avoid just that. please, give yourself more credit...i believe you deserve it more than i. i believe alot of us need to take that to heart. thanks for that quote, (((TN))) it's nice to see so many...Read More...

I personally find tomatoes to be quite a loud food - especially the red ones. So I do hope you won't be quietRead More...

As you all know, I am a co-moderator on this board for some time now. I am the only one, aside from Room2Grow that are still active. I have only very limited privileges as to what I can do here. I was asked, however, to post here that wishing (aka... IrishGirl) was banned from membership. If it is important to you to know the reason then please contact Shrinklady. I did not do the banning. I do not have that ability. I am only making the announcement as asked. If anyone has further questions...Read More...

Hi turtle, I definitely come and go here,mainly because of time pressures but also because I am wary about putting my stuff out there and tend to keep personal thoughts and opinions in. I do feel that I am not being a 'good' memeber if I don't post regularly, but I always read and gets lots from the board in doing that. My T would definitely tell me not to feel pressurised into doing anything I didn't want to. Saying that turtle it's always lovely to hear from you starfishyRead More...

GE Hugs to you! I'm sorry ur having a difficult time. You received a variety of answers so something for you to think about. I do know that thru my marriage & having mental issues that the worst time for me to make a big decision is when I'm not well. I've learned that I'll make extreme decisions then & sometimes regret it. That's just me. As for the H part I know how extremely difficult it can b when you don't feel supported by him. In my case I not only feel unsupported but totally...Read More...

((((JILLANN)))) Your post was very informative. Thank you so much for all the information. I didn't know that about the apathy. I'm physically close to my Mom and so more in a position to help her. I've suggested anti-depressants but she said no. (She said she's depressed.) She took her own Mom to the doctor and put her on anti-depressants so I have a bit of leverage there. I'm hoping they would perk her up a bit and motivate her to go out. My grandmother lived until she was 92 and saw every...Read More...

lol, RT SD, That is interesting. . . I never feel sleepy when I dissociate. I feel cut off from things, numbed, frozen, far away, but also very tense. It's a strange feeling. I suppose it is dissociation? Maybe it takes different forms. Anyway, that is funny about your T being more alert in the morning. Maybe she should have an afternoon coffee? lol. Glad you two worked out a solution though.Read More...

Oh my! You guys have given me so much support! It means the world to me. And you're right this lady is a royal BEYOTCH! I had to laugh at some of your responses to her behavior! lol! Born2Write you particularly cracked me up with the raw egg toss idea! ROFL. I can't imagine what she'd do! lol And it does feel like someone at work who I have to tolerate because after all living in the same building I have to deal with her on a pretty regular basis. I think she likes me believe it or not but I...Read More...

very nice touch, (((TAS)))Read More...

Nony your need is greater, just DH and me so no where near the washing you haveRead More...

((((((Poppet)))))) 100% We ALL screw up sometimes. It's inevitable. "he who never makes a mistake never makes anything"Read More...

(((CTL))) you've been such a great contributor here, and i've missed you over the months but understand that life goes on. i wish you the best in whatever you do and hope you can pop your head in at the cafe from time to time. good luck to you!Read More...

Oh yes, I find a ton of meaning and significance in my relationship with my home surroundings. I love decorating, painting, adding and subtracting things. The changes often mirror something in my internal world or express a value, so my home feels very much like an extension of me. It's my favorite place to be. I think my most recent change. . . I felt that the front of the house had too many right angles and looked too severe. Once something like that occurs to me it drives me crazy until I...Read More...