How are you now? I have just now read this thread and sorry I did not get here sooner, I am in the UK and know a bit about the system. A GP can refer you to have an assessment by a clinical psychologist. You have to be really REALLY upfront about how bad your symptoms are, as these guys are under staffed and trying to weed people OUT of their books. I got a really REALLY good psychologist that way, but it was a three month wait from asking GP to getting to see the P. Then you are in good...Read More...

xoxo, I read the link. I thought it was interesting how changing the tone or projection made such a difference. I can't relate on the mother part but just to say that my mom was in my feeling passive...my brother has told her that. Unfortunately, I was too passive also as I was informed this afternoon by my daughter but not for the reasons she thinks...something I have to live with but as of now she is not holding it against me. I know this sounds weird but I would be so scared when my dad...Read More...

Number9, thanks for your support. I'm sorry you are feeling the same way, though misery loves company. I've been with my T for 4 wonderful turbulent years. In case that sounds really long, I saw him every other week for quite a long time until I fell apart. LG< Such good questions. Today I mentioned power struggles. They've always been a problem for me. I don't really know a lot about power struggles but I am imagine that they develop in the FOO with a parent who doesn't take control or...Read More...

I think Ts can be aware of it but it doesn't mean they know how to deal with your specific needs within it. Had I known my feelings were "cliche" / as old as time for the model itself I may have understood it differently and therefore interacted differently with them. I thought my feelings were UNIQUE and I felt very alone with them just as I had felt alone my whole life struggling with bonding with people outside my family. Had my therapist clued me in that this was typical I think it would...Read More...

Hi JenDark, it seems that you are doing a lot of projecting onto your T. The things you think that SHE is thinking are really your own doubts and fears. The only way to know if she is thinking any of this is to ask her. I know that is easier said than done. The therapeutic relationship is the most important aspect of therapy. It is often said that it's the relationship that heals and that the relationship IS the therapy. My T and I spend a lot of time just discussing our relationship, how...Read More...

Me too! I've been reading his blog and website. I like the cave/bridge/village story. He sounds like someone who really understands. He explains things very clearly and really hits home on many things, at least for me. thanks for the heads-up TNRead More...

R2G, Glad you were ok with me bumping it up! I agree with you, talking to my T about googling was actually a pretty important turning point. It's when I started to understand that he really meant what he said about all of my feelings being welcome in his office. It also showed me that he really understood what it was like for me as a client and wanting to know him better. AGRead More...

((((YAKU))))) Glad you saw your pastor and everything was okay. But sorry to learn that your projections have moved on to your T. It's so hard to imagine your T having any bad feelings at all. He seems like such a love. But you should try to tell him if you can. Maybe you just need a little reassurance. HUGS, LieseRead More...

I have some positive news on this struggle for me. I'm not sure what has begun to shift, but I have been throwing quite a few things away lately, and with some JOY about throwing things away. I have not gotten to the hardest stuff, but I have been throwing quite a bit away - working on it in spurts. In the past few weeks, I would say I have given or thrown away three bags of clothes, three bags of old school books (why did I keep them? they are science books and no longer even up to date!Read More...

Exposed brick. Cozy old building. Shiny stuff. Fancy furniture. Plush rug. Masculine. Gets great light.Read More...

Hi Raven, I just wanted to say that coping with an ordinary 13 year old is difficult enough that I can't imagine how much more complex dealing with a child with RAD who was adopted at age 10 would be. It speaks so well of you that you chose to take on this challenge, but it is a very difficult road to walk. Of course there will be times, no matter how much you love her (and it's very clear that you do) where it will feel overwhelming and you'll feel depleted. I hope that the break from each...Read More...

(((((XOXO))))) The rescue stuff is confusing. I think I fell in love with my T because I think he has the life I want and I thought he could give it to me. Kind of a short cut, so to speak, instead of working on these things for myself and gaining them myself. Getting them through him. I guess I see that as rescuing. And wanting to be rescued. Because my life was too hard to face. IMO, it's not good to detach. You want to feel that connection with him so you feel that support all the time.Read More...

Sometimes you can't control genetics but I guess meds can help....Read More...

1. No 2. No 3. No to all 4. Yes, yes deffo 5. Yes, she was a fashion journo in her pre-therapist life, so is one of those classic well put together types, immaculate and tidy and always co-ordinated 6. No, I tend not to take care of myself physically at all 7, Yes she tries to compliment me if say I am wearing a nice scarf but I am so not used to not hearing compliments I tend not to respondRead More...

((Raven)) thinking of you. hehe thanks again for all the hugs/pictures. I love those stick figure huggers I did something I've never done before after my appointment w/ P today... I went to the gym. I think I will make that standard. I don't see her for another 3 months *yay* *yay* *yay* I'm hoping the triggers can be even less next time but I'm not sure this is the least disoriented/destructive/terrified I've ever been there and I think it's because I let my T help and I felt like... in a...Read More...

You are not the only one! I am currently in that place and not wanting to go to session Thursday. I've generally felt things have been good and always looked forward to Thursdays. Now, I really do think she's trying to get rid of me and I have to confront her ~ which is what is hard and I don't want to go. Yes, this is true. We're so used to being hurt and protecting ourselves, it's hard to imagine anything different. at least we can trust ourselves to be predictable and find anything we can...Read More...

Thanks BraveHeart, That was wise to move to another school district but the whole incident sounds pretty traumatic, including having to actually move from where you reside. Do you know what ever happened to that kid? My T lives about 30 minutes or so away from his office and it seems like a smart move. (Note to T in that article: move your office to a distant town.) He probably does run into people sometimes. He told me that it doesn't bother him at all when he runs into clients except for...Read More...

FMN - You don't need a psychiatric assessment to be feeling things/going through things/need friend's and family's love. Hugs to you, too! Yaku - do you have any on your "friends list" that you could write to at all privately? I have three I can, and only one I tell everything to. R2G - I remember when I went through outpatient (IOP) for a few weeks after going inpatient, we talked about the stigma of depression....even my therapist's intake forms have on it that "we should realize there is...Read More...

sorry, I need to figure out how to make the picture smaller when posting.Read More...

((((JANE)))) I remember seeing a movie a long time ago but can't remember the title. Maybe Dom DeLuise was in it? Or his son? Or someone like him? The narrator was depressed and SU, I think. There would be these scenes with him floating on top of the water at the ocean or bay. The camera was under the water looking up and you could see his body floating and the sun shining through. And he would talk about whatever it was that was stressing him out during these scenes. And so when I'm...Read More...

So, I paid better attention last night and as soon as I started feeling dizzy and nauseous and like I'm sliding back, my hand is rubbing that spot on my head. I also started knocking on it with my fist when I was trying to quiet stuff down. All unconscious and if I hadn't put myself to really pay attention to it, I wouldn't have thought much of it. So bizarre. Feel a bit weird that everyone else seems to dissociate pressing this spot, but I use it when I am dissociating. Though, if I'm not...Read More...

Totally true. I'm just worried now because my friend is still ignoring me ~ but she's like that and if she doesn't call in a few days, I'll call her.Read More...

((((BB)))) I'm so oblivious that I didn't even notice those pictures. Good thing you saw them. I just went back to the article and can't believe I didn't notice them. What have I learned to block out? So glad to be able to write to you because I wanted to tell you how touched I was by your account up above and how much that article helped you. Glad you had a good session with Cowboy T! Hugs, Liese P.S. My sincerest apologies to anyone and everyone that was triggered by the pictures. I got...Read More...