Cipher, Glad you're back on here and your H is going to therapy now. Sounds like things are getting better and I'm happy for you. HopefulRead More...

(((BRAVEHEART))) Oh, yes, good point about the emerging self. And BB makes some good points too. I guess it's all good as long as you feel like you CAN talk about the relationship if you need to. I can see how it would be helpful to work on you and then maybe you actually won't NEED to talk about him anymore. BB, good luck with your friend. It's so hard. My sister does the same thing. Goes over and over the past, over things she can't change. I keep thinking that something feels unresolved...Read More...

Thanks! I needed a laugh. Sorry to hear about the surgery and no driving for two weeks. That stinks! I don't think it's fair that these Ts of ours take breaks over the holidays, either. My T will be out for a while too so it will be 3 weeks for me between sessions. After weekly appts. that feels like forever. I too would be shutting down except that I'm too mad at my T to be doing so right now. I think she's even forgotten that this next week she would typically be calling me if she gets a...Read More...

Thank you TN, thank you Kashley. (((TN and Kashley))) TN, I don't really miss the touch on the arm...I just *notice* it when he doesn't do it, and feel mildly curious, why he does that sometimes, and not others. I wonder if it has to do with, if I am feeling bad, or have been crying? that's a thought- maybe that was why he did it before. Somehow that is quite a concept for me! sheesh. I almost wish I had the same reactions and intensity of feelings in therapy as I did with Guru, but I just...Read More...

(((Flutters))) this is just so good to hear - yeah I know, one swallow does not a summer make, but really you sound very hopeful and positive and your're going to see her again - that's just great!! s, MorgsRead More...

Thank you dear starfishy and lampers...your loving words and happiness for me make me feel warm inside. Love, BeebsRead More...

PM if you need to talk.Read More...

Hi xoxo, I agree with you. I think that I'm experiencing maternal affection but because I didn't have a mother figure in my younger years from 0 onward, perhaps it is a feeling that overwhelms me a bit. It is quite a foreign feeling this. It saddens me that it feels so unreal almost. I've told my T how the relationship between me and her feels somewhat surreal and so alien. Because I too have read so much about therapy, I have normalized it to a point where I could tell her. I think in my...Read More...

((((Echo)))) I missed your original post (I am not on the forum as much as I wish I were) - but I understand you wont be participating now. I hope things would be better for you soon....Read More...

((((RAVEN)))) It's so hard to communicate with friends about what we are going through. I find it that way at least. I have one really good friend who listens very supportively and a couple of others who listen but think it's all a bit nuts. Maybe you can just try to reassure her that it's you and not her and not offer her any more information than you feel comfortable giving. xoxo LieseRead More...

I'm so sorry Smiley that you're still struggling big time with this (but glad to hear from you because that means you ARE hanging in there and keeping yourself going.) Got no words of wisdom, just wanted to send you a cyber hug LLRead More...

FMN, Nah, not worried, although learning about this particular eccentricity of T's does seem to cast things in a somewhat ironic light. But my whole post was written, and meant to be read, sort of tongue in cheek. I understand if my sense of humor doesn't completely come across on a computer screen, though! Sorry about the confusion. Yaku, Haha, it would have been great to have been a fly on the all at that moment in your therapy. Although I know there is nothing more disappointing than...Read More...

thanks for your responses. I did read some of the other posts on transference. It scares me a lot. I've been suicidal at times about it because it's so heartbreaking. Strange I would feel that way because I don't want to go home with her but the thought of her being so kind and affectionate with her daughter just rips me apart. It's a good thing she's like that. I think she's probably an amazing mother. But it hurts me so much. Why? I really have to fight this because it is stopping me from...Read More...

((((Bornbroken))) Really glad to have you here. I came back to read your response, and re-read mine that you quoted. My response to you reminded me of a Ny Times article-the column about health and the economy--where people comment about the article posted..Well....people were talking aobut losing their jobs, their homes, and several doctors were suggesting that to cope--people need to do breathing exercises and meditation!!! While those things are good strategies, they don't seem...Read More...

Welcome here effed. I've had a great time being here and it is wonderfully supportive. Glad that you find it supportive also!Read More...

great news about the internship - you will be better for having had the experience of going for the interview. How good is it to have been offered it. Well done.Read More...

well like i said i have battle depression all my life i got marrired at 16 in 1982 had two boys the best thing i ever did was have them but by 1993 i was divoced and lost my boys. and my family and friends i was on so many meds and didn't understand what was going on the boys was with there dad i tryed to kill myself and was in a coma for 2 weeks when i came out of it i didn't know i was divoced i call him and ask why he was not there and he told me we was not marryed and i lost the boys i...Read More...

Hi LG, Thanks so much for your supportive words. They mean a lot. I can't wait until I process all this emotional stuff and I don't react so strongly anymore. BB, I saw your beautiful and insightful PM and am wishing you didn't delete it. I really wanted to think about what you said and give a thoughtful reply back but can't now because it's gone. I'm sorry that you had a case of PAD and felt like you had to delete it. I've been in an emotional knot all day myself. xoxo Love, LieseRead More...

LG, Sorry I'm a bit late too, but what a difficult choice - real head and heart dilemma . It's hard to say for somone else what to do, I want to tell you to go with the job and career, but that would be the pot calling the kettle black as I moved with my H and changed a career pathway as a result Do let us know how you get on, starfishyRead More...

Thanks AG. I feel with support here and explanations from real people who have been and are going thru it provides so much...it's great having a place to relate.Read More...

My daughter's old T said she was stuck last spring. She explained it as she (T)couldn't move her anymore because she'd used all her expertise during 5 years. She helped us find a new T and my daughters now "unstuck" again.Read More...

Hey DF... you sure have a lot going on. I'm trying to follow your posts... so it seems that you have been stressing over telling both Ts that you want to continue this way. Your insurance is all straightened out to see both of them which is wonderful. And now it also seems that they are okay with this situation? It all sounds like good stuff. I'm sure you were shaky and crying today as a release from the pressure that had been building up inside you. I'm glad your boss is understanding. I...Read More...

(((((FROSTY))))) I'm sorry I got it wrong and didn't hear you. You are important to us. ((((X)))) Please don't go. You are important to us too.Read More...

Brokes darling, I feel for you. Gosh, I never had a mother figure in my childhood as well. I was talking to my T about it and I cried quite a bit when she said that I never had a mother figure. It kind of hit me how important a mother figure is to a child and not having it can be debilitating for the child. Sometimes I look at mother's with they're children all happy and want to cry. I missed out on that big time. I'm so so sorry to hear what happened to you at school. That is terrible. I...Read More...

((((Yaku)))) It is super hard having to sit with stuff, isn't it? I'm glad your T is emphasizing patience...my T has to do the same thing with me. One thing I think I've realized is that if I post a whole lot about things, then they turn into just words rather than experiences, you know? I don't know if that makes sense. I think it's because my belief in some of my experiences is so shallow that if I share it too much, it becomes unreal because then it's *too* real. Okay, I know that...Read More...