A little while after my appointment with my T something really awful happened. It doesn't have anything to do with therapy. I've been in the midts of it for the past 36 hours, some friends helped in a way I am just numb about right now. I'm feeling really in a state of shock and survival - which I don't need to feel anymore. Im taking everything one very careful step at a time. My T said we could have a check in call tomorrow. It is like a short pre-planned call where we just talk about...Read More...

MH, Good luck on your math test!Read More...

HI Kashley and TN, I am not as strong as I thought I was. All this stuff really hurts. I did see my T on Monday. He was his wonderful self. He told me that he triages his float list. The emergencies get the first open slots. Then people like me who need to come in or who have had a difficult session get the next open slots. And, then, maybe people who have just missed an appointment or whatever are on the third tier. He said it would be unethical to pick on the basis of who pays what or what...Read More...

stoppers. i am sorry you are having this. i am no diagnostician, but that sounds like dissociation, as the others have said. i echo what the others have said, particularly strm, in asking your t about trauma, ptsd type experience. perhaps she knows what you are saying but doesn't want to alarm you with a name. i think, people with trauma and ptsd are most likely to dissociate. some things i have tried to notice when i do this, is, identifying what may have triggered this? sometimes that can...Read More...

thanks draggers. i like your two cents!! two pounds!! two euros!! y'no, the more i read, the more i see that the relationship is what heals. oh, i love him. i really do. i know it is transference, but, warm fuzzies all over. i think too, i can learn some skills through the book. the group was cancelled due to weather, and i will try it once and decide on it. i know the skills are good, and there is a difference in learning things live and reading it. too, i know i have a hard time with women...Read More...

No offence at all dear kashley, you just take good care of you please. We are here whenever you need some support (((((kashley))))) starfishyRead More...

'feel like' versus 'doing'...yes, every session 'cept one or two with dbt. but i don't, but i tell myself each time going in that i can quit. pa? never, in fact today he cancelled because of the weather, and my inner child felt so hurt, but, i knew the weather was iffy. and the last thing i would want is him to be hurt. so, big jill understands. but... i would never have the urge to skip that, or really, any other t i have had. too, i would hate to have to pay for a skipped appointment. too,...Read More...

Thank you all for your replies. I did ring my P last night and he was very comforting. I also read Incognito's thread and that helped a lot too. I feel so sad and depressed right now, with old P he would drag all of this out into the open and then just leave it there and I didn't know how to cope with it. I am hoping new P will know what to do because I sure don't.Read More...

Dear Pan, Sorry to hear we will see less of you, but glad it is for a happy reason - I hope your new job is fantastic. Good luck with it and do let us know how you settle in when you get the chance. Love, JonesRead More...

Dear Smiley, Thinking of you. Wondering whether you felt able to get to your appointment, and how you are feeling at the moment. Sending hugs and gentle care. JonesRead More...

That's awesome that he reached out to you and wanted to know if you were okay. Its so nice to know when you've been thought about and maybe even missed by T!Read More...

he he...taking a little break from homework..ughhh...got to get to bed at decent hour tonight.... Thank you so much for your kind words and support Pandora and Jill. 'Repressed' thats a very interesting topic. I'm not sure how it applies in my situation (my brain). I found it shocking I never realized I was in all actuality blaming myself all this time...especially since I felt/and actually was the 'victim'. I mean it makes sense I was completely oblivious to what I was actually feeling and...Read More...

I think that explains it beautifully! The super intimate is the awkwardness and um, er, that would be 'Therapy in a nutshell'. Well for me anyway. It is always hard to know whether we have real issues with a T or if we really are making up excuses as the discomfort gets unbearable. It is the push-pull bind AG often talks about, (AG where are you?...) wanting to move closer but being terrified of the expected hurt that the vulnerablity of intimacy brings. Frosty, it is difficult and...Read More...

((((Preppie Girl)))) I am so sorry to hear about the set back with your back. We haven't oficially met since i have been posting, (hello ) but you must be so disappointed at what has happened. I have a few friends who have had back and / or neck ops and they have all been fantastic for them and i hope yours solves the problem, takes the pain away and gives you a new lease on life. PanRead More...

thank you guys so much for all the support. i am so glad i took the time to post. The biggest difference here partaining to women and girls is how they treat them. women should wash clothes, do laundry, take care of the house and work. men go drinking with their friends at bars or ktv. married or not most men will still pay money for another woman to accompany them. i have really big trust issues as it is but when i am in a country where cheating is normal and prominant, its makes it ten...Read More...

ok, thanks to support here, i have talked to the t that does group dbt, and i told her i would come next week and try it. she seemed nice. sounded mature. said there are three women in the group, but one may not make it. i don't know if it is better to have a larger group, but that is what it is. i have strong feelings within the same day to do this, and hours later, feel, i don't need it. but, i have the time, and it is not that expensive (hello, df!!), so, i am going to try it. i will...Read More...

little df? I'll bet she's a rebel. Whaterver or wherever she is, she's still a part of you..... (I was reminded that very same thing about my "little antecedent" some years ago. I pissed him off because I wanted to own my sucesses without his help. When the adult gets dressed down by the child, it can get a little silly, but instructive, too.) I think those little guys just want to belong, you know? - not get tossed aside like they never mattered....however inept they were, they're still...Read More...

Yep - you sure didn't do anything wrong. Such an amazing set of logical rationales (for behavior) ...meanwhile some folks just don't get it. But beyond all that - some folks need to throw around their um, "empathy" like tossing a match into a dynamite shed, you know? It's more important to them, in fact, so damned important for them to spew their, ah, "empathy" that they become completely clueless that it might not be a bad idea to take in the whole entire picture, not just the iddy bit that...Read More...

Littleplanet, Hi there. Your post was concise and packed with meaning. Wondering if that T was right, if trusting back was not in the cards for you? It seems a bit grim that a T would say that. I like to believe that learning is always possible.Read More...

((((((Itshardtosay))))) Sorry things are so rotten. You have to take care of yourself, first and foremost. ((((((HUGS)))))) LieseRead More...

Have you considered going to a sex therapist with your husband? Or, if that is a bit too much, what about designating one night a week as "date" night. No kids, no household talk. Just you and hubby. Try a new restaurant each week....and a new sex position, perhaps??Read More...

a little self disclosure is bonding. but, too much, and i feel like...who's therapy is this anyway... that old sack, t3 talked all the time about herself. i can't begin to tell you how BAD she was. ohhhh!!! anyway. things that show their humanity and own struggles, a bit...like pa talked about the death of a friend just a bit today. it helped me to hear him share something with me that meant alot to him. so, a bit is good. NONE is too weird...too stiff (t1) ... jill and halo...that is SICK!Read More...

yay, sounds like the perfect solution...taking a little breather but not quitting. I love it! Enjoy your time off.Read More...

Hi Pan, Miss my Dad something awful sometimes so I can relate. On the first year anniversary of his death, we had a dumb dinner - I think it was called. Check it out on the internet. I can't remember the rules but it turned out to be a lot of fun with all of us eventually sharing really nice warm memories of my Dad. Part of the dinner is in silence but we all did eventually talk. My kids admitted afterwards that they were nervous at first but really enjoyed it. With your mil's birthday so...Read More...