Aw, thank you Mayo! We are all trying hard, aren't we? oops just to clarify, Jill brought this thread back, not me... BBRead More...

LL, To me it sounds like this therapist is making an attempt to connect with you by exposing the fact that she has sat where you are sitting and understands how you might feel. It's so scary to take a T at face value and to let ourselves trust, at least enough to set aside our negative assumptions of them. I hope your search for a T and all the confusion will end soon. deeplyrootedRead More...

Thanks so much everyone for your beautiful words. BB, I NEEEEED to see video footage of the BB dance...to SG's electric guitar riff! it is for therapeutic purposes. Yeah, party in the woods.... As for you, AG, you're making me blush - thank you for saying those lovely things. I am having moments of missing T, feeling sad about the things we can't finish together. But mostly it feels complete somehow. Thank you all for making this the right place to to work on processing this. Kashley and...Read More...

AG I wasn’t around to reply straight away to your post - I’m so sorry you got hit with such an onslaught of illnesses. I hope you are heaps better now and getting back into stride - sounds like you got really thrown there for a bit (thank God for your wonderful T!) I also hope your husband is now ok and everything settles back down. So much for a vacation huh? Maybe it’s better for the health not to take holidays lol. Good to see you back AG! LLRead More...

Thank you Lamplighter - no you didn't upset me. You have to kind of read between the lines. He did allow a couple friends to visit. He was there 8 days and discharged. He still can't see me. I know he is being genuine. There seem to be so many different reactions to abandonment. Some folks cling too tight to their mate from fear. My partner has a fear of attaching. A trauma in his childhood taught him that emotional closeness = vulnerable = panic and then his choice is to flee (flight or...Read More...

Oh, that's it exactly. And it's such a messed up notion, but I can't get past it. I just wish I understood. I need more patience. You hit the nail on the head again, BB. That was a major problem I had with my last T and in group therapy, since both of those were limited to a small number of sessions. Getting into 'deep' emotional stuff just didn't seem worth the turmoil. I can't imagine having the month in between (I admire you for being able to deal with that), because digging into unknown...Read More...

hee hee, thanks, from ALL OF US JILLS!!Read More...

smiley, it will pass honestly it will. Keep yourself grounded as best you can ... having 50 people for a BBQ would stress me out too, but will no doubt keep you busy in preparation! Shall we all say a little prayer for sun over smiley's house this weekend? starfishRead More...

Welcome Agent...it's nice to meet you! Looking forward to seeing your posts! I've been reading this thread, but have nothing to add, really..I lie down after sessions and think, try to sleep a bit since I meet my T too early in the morning...sometimes I write important things down if I can remember the session. BBRead More...

Hi SG, I just had to chime in to say that I can understand you and your DH perfectly. I so badly wish my DH would do couples therapy with me. He and I would be exactly the same as you and yours. We are both avoidant and our marriage sounds like yours. It's sad and very empty to live in that kind of a marriage. My T told us to talk for 20 minutes a night and we struggle trying to do that. It usually takes us about 10 minutes to accomplish the template she gave us, so I can't imagine trying to...Read More...

Yes jones- and conquer them wearing heels. thanks all- for the B'day wishesRead More...

Debbye, I'm glad that your T seems to be on your side with this. I completely agree with what he said. Personally, I wouldn't sign a waiver to let them talk. It sounds like your teacher is the one with the problem. I'm sorry this has been so upsetting for you.Read More...

Hi UV, Just want to say that procrastination, sluggishness, slowness are all problems for me that I have gained some significant ground on over the last year of steady psychodynamic work. They are not 'gone' as problems for me, and I haven't made progress in every area with this, but actually when I look back as I am at the moment (doing some self-evaluation as my t is leaving) I feel a LOT less stuck in many areas and take action a lot more speedily. I'm not sure how close our situations...Read More...

Hi there again Ultraviolet. I hope your next session is soon. Let us know how it goes? :hug: LamplighterRead More...

Thanks, Monte! I appreciate it. You explained it perfectly.Read More...

Hi Caeti nice to see you back here! I’m sorry you’ve been in hospital - that sounds like things got really bad for you? I hope you’re feeling more able to cope with things now? I’m not familiar with the positive feelings you’re talking about in relation to a T - maybe others on here who have similar experience are better able to relate to what you are explaining. My immediate thought on your question about ‘coming clean’ with T and explain about a relationship of which he knew nothing is...Read More...

Thanks Dragonfly x Your idea of the scrap book is great and i do think i need something to focuss on coz at the moment it feels such a long time until i see her again. Maybe i will try and write Lots of hugs ((((((((dragonfly))))))) to you x Agent H63Read More...

This is a very interesting discussion. I think that what makes therapy (good therapy, that is) so unique is exactly what Russ said - that everything in therapy just is. It's something that I constantly have to remind myself of. Ah, fluffy bullshit. I'm very familiar with it. I was very aware of the fluff pouring out of my mouth at various points in my last session, and it really is hard to stop. I think it may have seemed like I was countering anything my T said with a ridiculous excuse. I...Read More...

Hi STRM, Nice to meet you, too! There's no question that the "child" inside is deeply involved with everything. In my therapy, we don't spend a ton of time talking about my "inner child" but there is an emphasis, for example, on how my mother's emotional reservation and void of any kind of passion for anything (including me) effected that part of me. Also, how my father's sneering dismissiveness, distance and inability to connect on any level effected that part of me. In fact, my T described...Read More...

Echo, Luckily I had already read your post before you deleted it. It was not too ranty. I agree with Monte, but also wanted to say that I get where you are coming from. I have three kids and it is the same day, day after day. Sometimes it is just hard and when you feel like you don't have anyone to back you up or give you a break it can be so much harder. I don't know how old your children are, but kids are exhausting. As great as it is to be a Mom, it is one of the most exhausting and...Read More...

Well, I've definitely been put on a pedestal... and left there. (They don't like it when you keep jumping off and refuse to stay put.) I've had one that fit just right for a while, but didn't fit anymore once I started to grow. I had to ask that one to keep on rolling without me. I've met many who had too many missing pieces for me to fill, even through I tried by best to fill them all anyway. (Hmm... my husband is definitely one of these.) I thought/wanted to think that my P was the Big O,...Read More...

Oh, and about the medication issue. I know that I too have always had a hard time with memories and memories with feeling. Since I feel like I have so few memories, it's hard to remember how I felt before I went on medication (it feels like I have a whole blank period of memories while I was in the throws of depression) - but I suspect I was much the same as you, MTF. I should try and bring it up with my T, but sometimes (ok, a lot of times) I wonder if I'm overreacting, since I'm not...Read More...