Thank you, Draggers and eme! I'm looking forward to my next session with T to discuss several topics. My T did mention that I could possibly be diagnosed with a panic disorder, but that's all she could come up with. I read that section of my DSM 5 and it some what fits. I'm not sure I'd diagnose myself with it completely though. Thank you for the well wishes in this new year! I wish you both the same!Read More...

Hugs and happy new year all. I'm not sure I used the abbreviation correctly. But you get me. I love how much space he gives for the magnitude of the loss, and how much gentleness and kindness. Wishing you each that. xxxxxRead More...

Thank you all for the wonderful support After I wrote my never ending post I really struggled with whether I should keep it up, I felt silly for some reason But I think since things have been so raw lately I notice those times are harder for me to keep the deletion spells at bay. All of your responses really meant a lot to me (((pengs))) Thank you lovely I didn't even recognize it to be hard work at the time, just felt like I was flailing about, so hearing that from you really made me feel...Read More...

Monte... there was so much of what you wrote that resonated with me that I had a hard time narrowing down what I wanted to quote. I think what I quoted above really touched me in relation to my own T and you put it (as usual) so beautifully into the written word. I, too, have been kicking and screaming and fearful and anxious and gnashing my teeth about what T cannot give me and what I cannot go back and have. My T has been patiently trying to show me over a long period of time what he CAN...Read More...

(((jones))) so pleased to meet you Thank you for reading and replying. I am deeply sorry that you experienced a lack of T's unbiased response. These outside issues only serve to frustrate an already painful and difficult process. As you said, things can get messy so easily. I am very thankful to hear what you wrote (although it pains me you experienced it) because I like to see other's stories and learn from them. I hold out a hope that this new T might have an open perspective from here,...Read More...

xRead More...

TK.. thank you for sharing your story. You are very brave to do so and you have certainly come a long way. You showed great strength in turning your life around and I admire that very much. Happy (belated) anniversary. I wish you many more of them. Hugs TNRead More...

((((chezza)))) and ((((draggers)))) thanks for empathizing and affirming. there is definitely comfort in knowing you're not alone in something oh, AH, i absolutely agree with your point that i haven't failed in the big picture. i'm still going, afterall, and making baby steps. i guess i just mean that i could be making such bigger strides if i could just believe in myself enough to bring the material and share it with T without fearing that he'll think i'm being petty and ridiculous. and...Read More...

Well, it really helped me to write that all out. It helps to be able to say these things and know I have an audience to hear me, but to receive all of your responses, too, is even more satisfying. I DEFINITELY very much enjoyed reading everyone’s input. Thank you. CD—a lot to read! I wonder if there is a record for longest post on here. Thanks for reading it all and thinking of me. Puppet—I am glad you “enjoyed” reading it. Exactly what I like to hear. It’s also why I said the same thing...Read More...

(((ninn))) Oh I love the idea of bringing kitties!! I'm sorry to hear you went through that with your son that is so awesome to me when they use animals to comfort patients, especially kids seem to respond so well to that (((pingles))) thank you!! I love that your T does that I imagine I will react the same way. Frankly I think I'd do a lot better if I could have a dog be the only one in the room with me!! lol my 2 pet dogs have an amazing way of sensing my emotions, and they truly respond...Read More...

No offense taken! Wishing you the bestRead More...

Thank you, AH. ..Read More...

Hello Mork Ah, the words could have been written by myself. By the way, politicians are scum. But I will leave that for another time. I am replying to you because I know the feeling of being surrounded by amoral people. Which does connect to our current state of affairs in politics also. Do not let anyone tell you that you are in any way ill or mentally sick to feel that way, you have every right to feel angry. The dilemma is, how to live in a world that is 95% filled with very irritating...Read More...

(((pengs))) Thank you sp!! I think you're right, it is worth giving a chance, and at least seeing how she reacts. Worst case she says no at that point, at least I gave it a go? and I think deep down I'm going to have a hard time not at least seeing her once more, she was really special to me & I hadn't realized how much I'd missed her (((sandy))) So nice to meet you!! Thank you for all your insightful thoughts, I feel I should give this T a chance. My last one had some very questionable...Read More...

Told ex T to dispose of records and in future 121 therapy will not be my preferred choice treatment. Signing up for some trauma/addiction workshops that are pioneered by Pia Melody (: yay... money better spent IMO (:Read More...

I've benefited from your post and the responses because I have gone through something similar during my year in therapy and thought that it meant that I was unravelling. I'd feel good in my sessions with my therapist, usually, and then start to feel an intense but undefined emotion a little after leaving. Then, about three days of going over the session, maybe writing a response, not sleeping, and in general feeling unhinged. Then, I'd reconstitute and by the time of my next session I'd be...Read More...

Hi True North... I replied to one of your earlier posts not long ago and this one seems to be a follow-up. As a person who recently quit therapy and has some doubts about that, I learned a lot from this post and appreciate your sharing it.Read More...

Thank you so much for sharing this in detail, BLT. I'm in a similar place right now emotionally and feel like I've tried everything. I found your post inspiring and motivating.Read More...

Hi True North I hope that I am using the reply function properly and not posting in the wrong place. (I'm new here) I have MS and so have over the years had a bunch of MRIs. As well, I had some when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Somebody here said that when we're in pain, we're more vulnerable emotionally, too. I agree with that. But I also think there's something about the MRI in particular: the institutional look of it, the banging, the size. It's a machine that looks inside us and...Read More...

I finally got to see T! It's been a while and it was nice to have a session. Although, now I have more homework to do. It's an assignment about ending a current relationship assertively. I know I need to do this for my own good and probably for the other person's benefit in the long run. This is just hard. I told T I would do it before our next appointment, but in the meantime I have a ton of homework/projects for school to complete. Another thing that happened in my session is that T told...Read More...

((JILLIAN)))) You really do sound very brave to make yourself so vulnerable, and you got through it. I also think it is so great that DH is willing to go to Therapy and learn new skills. Really sounds like a win-win situation. You said it all when you mentioned that "It is necessary for real intimacy, but its so uncomfortable". Thank You for being such a great example for all of us on this forum.Read More...

Thanks, Liese. I wound up emailing my entire post to my T, so at least she now understands where I am at with this! I didn't have time to read the whole article but what I did read made sense. In my case I don't think it's been so much of a mismatch between my skills and what I've been applying for, as a mismatch between my temperament and the demands of the job market (especially in the height of the recession last time I was seriously looking.) So I think it's not so much that the...Read More...

Thanks AH!Read More...

(((TN))) Thank you so much I really can say that I would be in a much much worse place if not for you guys helping as much as you do. Seeing that you have overcome so much and kept going, it's been so inspiring to see your strength!! Thank you for everythingRead More...

(((Jillann))) (((about))) (((athenacus))) Thank you guys!!!Read More...