Thanks everyone for your help. It is all over, T is back, the time has past, I can't even remember the distress I had about it - such is my emotion compartments and lack of feeling - switched it all off but at least I realised at the time that the issue bothered me a lot. My T didn't ask about it . Thanks againRead More...

Hi TK, I so understand. I'm in the same place today.Read More...

I got 16/20 . Not too good.Read More...

TK and little TKRead More...

(((Jen12))) That does suck working through the original issues that bring us to therapy is difficult enough without adding extra difficulty on top! I'm so sorry you've had such pain with T1 and 2. Your first T sounds familiar I really think it will be important to allow yourself time to process the grief you are feeling over these experiences. Its so wonderful that you have T3 by your side to do this. Even though the transference will be painful and difficult to work through, it can prove to...Read More...

AH -- I'm so sorry you are going through this right now and that it has not been a quick and painless process. One can only distract themselves *so* much before grief re-pokes its way in. The distracting oneself and the grieving are both exhausting, I know. I'm glad you are sharing your experience. It is a help to me, although I would rather you have never experienced this. ((AH))Read More...

((cat)) I can relate to your post and all the responses sooooo much!! It's intense. It's scary. It's miserable. Sometimes I think finding a safe place to ride through the waves of emotions is helpful, to let them all flow- the pain, fear, anger, numbness. And then trying to soothe the younger parts as much as possible and keeping busy to pass the time helps a little bit. Hang in there AHRead More...

(((TK))) sounds like things were really tough during session but some great discoveries and progress made! remember what you said about baby steps, that's always so important. sending hugs for you and li'l one for the upcoming weekend. you can make it, I believe in you AHRead More...

((((COGS)))) It's all terribly painful. Your T might be a bit thick or maybe he is uncomfortable with certain conversations. BUT, he has proven that he will not abandon you. That's a good place to start. The more you can verbalize to him the things you want or expect from you, the better off you will be. Sometimes our expectations get us into trouble with relationships. It's not that's it's wrong to expect things but we might expect something from someone they are unable to give. For you to...Read More...

Big hugs to both of you. I'm so sorry things are at crisis point. I agree on the meds front. Recently I had to go and get some Valium at a very low dose just to allow me to function enough to get through the day. I wonder whether doc would make an exception to help get you through the immediate crisis? I know that what has happened has absolutely rocked your world but if you can, try to hold on that you were really getting somewhere with Lil one and T and that that means it is possible to...Read More...

I'm so sorry you are struggling with the fallout of losing your T. Even though it is immensely difficult, you are doing something positive to protect yourself, something very courageous. I appreciate that your wounded parts don't feel massively consoled by that right now though. Edit: on rereading it feels like I kind of glossed over your immense pain and jumped straight to the coping strategies so I just wanted to reiterate how very sorry I am that you are having to go through this,...Read More...

Thank you everyone for your words of encouragement. There are times lately that I feel like I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown. With everything li'l one and I are working on with T, plus the latest revelations about my adoption, plus work stressors, I feel I'm at my limit. Unfortunately, to top things off last week was a frantic call from my mom at work to say "dad is missing"! he's suffering from increasing short-term memory problems and apparently he went out last week (in the car) to...Read More...

Thank you for reminding, AH, about the mandalas. A friend suggested them a while ago and I keep forgetting about them. Li'l one loves colouring. As torturous as today was to get thru, we did. But, unfortunately not without another cursed panic attack while in the cafeteria. Thankfully, it didn't last long...mostly because I had to get my sh*t together so I could I chair a meeting I called this afternoon. As I was going thru this latest attack, I truly felt like I'm going to suffer a nervous...Read More...

((Liese))Read More...

(((AH))) That is a pretty cool analogy. I'm sorry you have to go through this.Read More...

(((Yaku))) Just wanted to send some hugs and support your way, I hope your fears are eased soon Thinking of you AHRead More...

Hi TN, I've been reading and sending you lots of gentle thoughts. Sorry I didn't chime in to say that but wanted to leave aRead More...

TK hang onto those buds of hope. That is wonderful you can feel that starting to blossom. I have a difficult time believe that I could ever be happy again. My parents were very negative people, especially my mother who had a scare story for everything I ever wanted to do. These feelings are just new to you and it will take a little while to feel comfortable with them but don't give up. TNRead More...

RTRead More...

Tygr That sounds like really good news. It is so nice to hear about a doc stepping up and calling you to reassure you. Hopefully this will lead to some real support while you sort out your life. JillannRead More...

WOW...just......WWOOOWWWW!!! Even tho this isn't my thread, I have to say everyone's words and insight into their very hurt little ones have truly shed a bit more light on things for li'l one and I. Thank you all for this unexpected gift today! To you, AH, I really, really wish I could use a magic wand to take away even just a tenth of the pain you're experiencing right now. Unfortunately, all I can offer are cyber hugs and words of support. The KidRead More...

(((TK)))Read More...

yup, we have tried working with my various protectors and the part that feels ashamed. I feel like I'm a simple person because all roads lead to my exiled needy part, which the shame is trying to protect. I just really can't handle IFS, at least right now. My T has finally decided to respect my strong dislike of the method. Maybe sometime in the future we can work again with some of my parts...but I'm not sure I'm cut out for that. I know it can really help others though.Read More...

((Ninn)) Sorry to be so late to this, but wanted to tell you that I have been in therapy, on and off (although more on than off) for over 27 years. To me, three years is isn't even enough time to really draw in a good breath. I think the new trend towards using pharmaceuticals (NOTE: no problems with mediction, ADs have been a life saver for me, just don't think they're a fix-all) and fast fix therapy, and the fact that many schools are focusing on that is producing a new generation of Ts...Read More...

I think when considering whether or not something said is appropriate there are a lot of factors that need taking into account and, like lots of people have said, context is important. One of the things I have found useful is to ask the question "Who's needs are being served by this disclosure or comment?" Ts need to ask themselves this question when they are interacting with clients. The point of the therapeutic relationship is that it is there purely to serve the client's needs, not the...Read More...