I actually saw her today the the enrolment center and freaked out a little. I went up to her and told her I would drop out of school because it was too uncomfortable of a situation and she told me to schedule and apointment with one of the other counsilers and I am still undecided on that.I am right in the middle of classes right now and I am really dealing with alot of depression and anxiety today. This whole situation just sucks.Read More...

Yeah, makes me laugh out loud now, but at the time....well, you know.Read More...

Thank you, poppet To be honest, I'm also a little bit afraid of hearing a crappy reason. Almost nobody doing such things or far worse has given a reasonable explanation in my life, they always thought they were right regardless of the size of what they did. Please T pleaseee turn out to be nice.Read More...

hmmm very interesting BLT. Food for thought. Thanks.Read More...

I'm sorry to hear that happened Somebody. As painful as relationship troubles are, I think these things happen for the best in the long run. I hope you can do something kind for you today....you deserve that and I wish you all the best. I'm wondering if you've found anybody to hang out with at college yet? College can be a great place if you make a couple of friends...or it can be hard it you are alone. ALso, this is a great site to learn from others on...read some of the great info on here...Read More...

Could you Skype with any of the Ts/Ps?Read More...

Update: My behavioral health case manager called me tonight. She seems nice and to understand the importance of being both accurate and sensitive to how much distress the company has been causing. We scheduled a conversation for 2:00pm tomorrow. She said, because she is on the clinical side of things, she may not know all the answers to the procedural issues, but she will stay with me through the process of getting it, rather than letting me get bounced around unanswered or inaccurately...Read More...

TAS, I wanted to chime in earlier, but I didn't get the chance. I am another person who has had a lot of negative transference with my therapist. I still have a lot of criticisms and doubts about him. I still struggle with it. I am coming up on three years with him. It is definitely not easy. My T does let me tell him how I feel about him and accepts my complaints, and that helps somewhat. It took me a long time to figure out that I should just tell him everything that I felt about him. He...Read More...

Thanks MetaMantraMe and GreenEyes. I appreciate your words and support. MetaMantraMe: What wonderful metaphors... they make perfect sense to me! Thanks for sharing!! I have to agree with this. This week, my T was talking about how when we finally learn to feel, it's unfortunate that all of the bad feelings come up first. But we have to make our way through them so that we can also feel good things. I think that's part of the hell your friend was referring to... all the bad feelings that come...Read More...

3M YOU ROCK!Read More...

((((Poppet)))) - I don't think you have any reason to feel that you have offended anyone. Your post is brave, wise, and lovely b/c if comes from a place of supporting someone else. ((((((((((Poppet))))))))))))))))Read More...

Thanks for the Hugs BLT Anon, Athenacus - Yes, she is getting her own needs met. You know the thing is that makes it so hard, is I think its all coming from a good place. A place of her thinking she is "helping". But I just don't understand what she is thinking. I tried to contact her for support a few weeks ago about something else before the stuff with my Dad and she told me she was afraid of hurting me or creating too much dependancy and wouldn't even talk to me. But when it condusive to...Read More...

Thank you, Kashley!Read More...

Hi Ang! I don't think we've met, but I hope it's okay that I chime in here. I do share shameful/graphic things with my T, but I generally do it in writing. I write, and then she reads while we are in session, and she responds (adhering the strict rule that she is not to directly quote anything I have written because it is very upsetting to me). I've been with her for 6 years, and I still have a very difficult time actually talking about too much detail unless she intiates it. For some...Read More...

The last time my T uttered the word "attachment," I rolled my eyes so badly that she jokingly apologized and mimed trying to stuff the word back into her mouthRead More...

((((HELD))))) That sounds like a good idea. I was thinking you could do that and just call when you need an extra session or go back to weekly and cancel when you don't need to go. Would you actually call for an extra session? It's still so hard for me to ask for anything though I'm trying to push myself more and more.Read More...

Black_tea- Thank you for writing back. As I read on this board, I do see a lot of people wanting different types of relationships with their T or at least the feelings for their T are similar to mine. I have two T professors currently that don't believe in transference/countertransference. They say it's a special relationship that the client and therapist have. A kind of relationship that isn't the same as any other because both people bring themselves to the room. I find that a refreshing...Read More...

There are many roles my T takes on - protector and abuser, father, friend and spouse. There are times I'm very clingy and just want to sit on his lap and be cuddled all day and other times I completely despise him and wish we'd never met. All to do with lots of early trauma and deprivation, losing both parents by 27 and current unfulfilled needs with my family.Read More...

I had quite a few dreams about my ex-therapist, but I never told him. Here they are: 1)This one was before I met him: My sister was sick and lying in a bedroom at our grandparents' house (she's a patient of his, btw). She was supposed to have a session with him, but instead, he came there. In real life, my sister started seeing him before I did, and told me he looks like Robert De Niro. So, in the dream, I wanted to peek into the room and check if he looks like De Niro. 2)The other dream...Read More...

I really enjoy reading this thread. I met with my pastoral counselor today and realized that I have been seeing her for a couple months now and taking off my shoes has never crossed my mind even though I nearly always take them off when I am with my therapist. It will be interesting to see if this changes with time. deeplyrootedRead More...

Liese, That is an inspiring story. It reminds me of something my therapist said to me at my last session three days ago that I continue to ponder. We were talking about some of my past dysfunctional behavior and she wanted me to know that I am healthy even though this does not mean I no longer need therapy. But, the more I think about her encouragement, the less I look down on myself for the issues I am still trying to resolve. It feels good to have someone believe I am not a hopeless case. ...Read More...

Hey COGS, If I could face my T today, you can face your T tomorrow.Read More...

Hey everybody - I didn't want to post all of this and then disappear after all of your thoughts and support, so I wanted to say I'm still around but not I'm not able to post an update right now. I had a sort of rough T appointment and then fell apart and had a really rough week. I'm doing better now, but feeling really shaky and every time I think about my old T or my new T it all gets triggered again so I'm trying to take a break from thinking about it and just get on with my life a bit. I...Read More...

Thank you for the responses, All!Read More...