AWww, Thanks R2G.Read More...

I meet with "my man" on Friday and I will have to face the embarrassment of the text I sent, deep breath and all the rest, I go red at the drop of a hat!!! My mother, after giving the "speech" decided to get slightly better and is now talking about going home. That is so much pressure for me. She cannot cope on her own and I am not mentally fit to deal with it I think. A friend says I should tell the hospice what is going on in my life so that they can then adapt the care package. Ah what to...Read More...

You hum it, Draggers, I'll play it! ((((Draggles)))) My best advice for the tired is just to let it go. Give yourself a break. Cup of tea. Mind the bannisters. xxxxRead More...

(((Anon))) I have been thinking about you. I think you did really well to call - I hope you feel a little more in control now. Some information definitely better than no information.Read More...

Uggggghhhhh, I was in the backseat of a car driving around Maine yesterday all day. Got a few moments to myself this morning so I want to thank everyone for replying and respond before I have to get in the back of that car again. (((HELD))) I couldn't cry with my T for a really long time. Finally did cry with him over feeling like he was ignoring my pain . Oh, that really felt good. He WAS ignoring my pain but you know who (FOO) really ignored my pain . So, it was sort of doubly healing. He...Read More...

Loving you, Liese!!Read More...

"I can feel something inside me say, 'I really don't think you're strong enough-- nooo!'" So this thread is reminding me of a song now. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbXiECmCZ94 (((Liese))) (((JenDark))) (((TN))) (((Catalyst))) (((BLT))) Thanks all of you for the responses. It was good to read them and see how others can relate. Seems a lot of us have trouble of one sort or another with the strong concept. I think if I were a T I'd try to go a bit lighter on the cliches, lol. I wonder if...Read More...

My T talks a lot but I can't recall any recurring themes or anything really funny that he has said. He used to start the session with, "So what good thing did you do for yourself?" and it annoyed the shit out of me so I asked him to stop. Now he slips it in at the end, "So what are you going to do for yourself until I see you again?"Read More...

I have blankets at home that I like to snuggle with on the couch. I bring wolfie and max (another wolf) to sessions in my backpack for the littles, but they rarely need them anymore, like maybe once a month. T sometimes puts one of his blankets on us, but they are wooly, not very soft. But, still, 'cause he has put them on when we're shivering/shaking, it feels special. But one very little part has a really bad reaction to blankets, so I guess I have to be careful with them. We hug the soft...Read More...

((((Jane)))) That sounds like severe anxiety and panic attacks. I hate to say this, but its probably what a psychiatrist would also say-you should be on a med regularly for the symptoms you described. Klonopin can be that med, at least for now. Klonopin is also an anti-convulsant; it's addiction propensity is much lower than other meds in its class, like the Ativan. The Ativan should be good for emergencies, and it is short acting. Your doc would probably tell you its ok to take less of the...Read More...

I haven't done it, but I've wished to take T to familiar places from my childhood while talking about stuff. Maybe connecting with things a little more clearly. I doubt T would do a field trip, though, so I've never even thought to ask. Most of the trauma was in current or previous family homes, so it's not like I could just bust in there with my T. Or did you mean alone, not with your T?Read More...

Since others are talking about how their therapist refers to them... T has no problem calling me (or any parts) by names. He uses all parts names effortlessly, though he hits a snag with "he" pronouns sometimes, because though they present as male inside, "we" are female. He has called me Kiddo...a lot and for a long time. I've had no less than six people randomly call me that since starting therapy (including T and the psychiatrist I saw very briefly) without prompting. Weird, since my dad...Read More...

Thank you for all your support. I'm glad Dragonfly. Thinking of writing him another letter to ask before I go to court.Read More...

UPDATE - When I called my P to get the consent to release the info from my T, he said that he doesn't want me to ween off the Zoloft yet. He wants that to be a last resort. He is supposed to add something (like a booster) to it but I need to go in and talk to him first. Had an appointment yesterday, but my back went out on Sunday so I have been laying on the couch stuck since then...getting more depressed...Read More...

Dragonfly! So sorry all of that happened. What a learning experience that must have been. Boundaries can seem negative at times...but ultimately, I guess they serve their purpose in keeping us safe, yes? I hope things are going better for you now, and thank you for sharing your story! To better days, T.Read More...

I agree that to have your T offer something like this is a HUGE compliment! It's a very tempting offer! I like what BG said - definitely fully and from all possible angles, explore this with your T. The only thought that popped into my head is that what if you still want her to be your T? Just because you are a T doesn't need you will be automatically free of anything that you currently might want to talk to a T about. As nice as it would be to work with her, it might also be nice to have...Read More...

Unbroken/catalyst - Thanks for the responses. That sounds so awful and I'm so sorry you both had to go through that. It never dawned on me before that this could happen b/c I have been seeing my T on and off for a really really long time. But when I read about it happening to others, it really tore at my heart when I tried to put myself in their shoes...just awful. I think I may ask my T about it. Especially since I am about to go through a medicine change and I really really need her around...Read More...

i read all this shortly after my original post and couldn't make myself respond. i just want to let you know that all of your replies touched me deeply and i felt SO much less alone. so thank you all (((( HUGS )))) ((( brokes ))) i know some of your story and i just want to say that i hope someday you can get some resolution with what happened. ((( Summer ))) i'm sorry you were forced into quitting when you didn't want to. that sucks. yeah, it's nice to fantasize that you'll get the response...Read More...

Btw - thank you. That makes alot of sense. I'm not gonnalet this get the better of me. I have two wonderful children to care for and I'm gonna work hard on figuring this all out and stop hiding and stuffing. I don't want to end up just like my parents....that is my biggest fear. I never want my kids to feel even an ounce of what I went through.Read More...

(((jane))) Just my two cents, but I don't think you said anything out of line or rude here. To me, this just read like being appropriately assertive and taking care of yourself. I see nothing to apologize for. I'm not sure why doctors would ask about the PTSD-- maybe concern over a physical cause or result that could need treatment/may have gone untreated? Maybe to explore if you need medication or a referall to a therapist or p. doc? IME, medical doctors rarely ask personally nosy...Read More...

(((Cat))) I get what you mean about being more sympathetic to others than to yourself - I'm the same in that respect. (((Unbroken)))It is the feeling that I "deserve" (complicated word) to have that permission - that is where I am stuck. (((Ninna))) Even though my examples may be slightly different to yours, I agree it was all the stuff about being told as a child that crying was for babies, "cowboys don't cry" (not that I was a cowboy - tomboy yes, cowboy no). I got the idea that I always...Read More...

Hi Everyone - Thanks so much for all of your responses. I have to admit I'm having a really rough day today (it's tomorrow) and I keep thinking that I wish I could just fast-forward. All of your posts and support make me feel better. Thanks, guys.Read More...

Thanks (((xoxo))) My insurance doesn't pay for my nutritionist either, but she's been instrumental in my recovery, so it's worth the sacrifice of paying out of pocket. This is a sensitive subject, I understand that, and appreciate your cautionary words. You are so right - you never know, and if your words help one other person escape the pain, all the better. (((puppet))) I hadn't thought of burn out, since this has lasted several months, it just seems to be worse right not cause of...Read More...

I'm glad you were able to tell your T what you needed and get him back on the boat. Yeah, I agree, that things are often more complicated than they seem like they need to be, but I haven't found a way to make them less complicated myself, so definitely don't think it's just you!!! Off to get Boo ready for a nap, but SO glad you talked to your T directly about it. Good job!!! That can be really hard and I'm sure he's proud of you for that too!Read More...

Yes, sometimes transference can have an adverse effect on therapy. However, if you are seeing someone who was psychoanalytically educated and trained, transference is basically the heart of therapy. So one thing I wanted to make clear-when transference "gets in the way" of therapy positive transference can be just as or more destructive to therapy as negative transferrence. Its not a matter of positive or negative, but a matter of INTENSITY. There are things a therapist can do to lessen that...Read More...