I wish I could talk to my T about my thoughts, but the way she has reacted in the past keeps me from even telling her anything about my 'bad' thoughts now. I'm not sure what I want her to say or how I want her to respond when I bring up my dark thoughts, but I have told her in the past that I just want to be able to talk to someone about them. In the past she will immediately say, "How do you think your kids would feel?" or "You will scar your kids forever" that sort of thing....she has...Read More...

Frosty, Research has pretty consistently demonstrated that the efficacy of therapy is much more highly correlated with the strength of the theraputic alliance than it is with the modality practiced by the therapist, so no matter what your new P is practicing, the fact that you are feeling comfortable with her is a very good sign. I also think that a therapist's willingness to incorporate more than one approach is a really good sign since humans are complex enough that there really isn't a...Read More...

R2G...I think you should be pleased that you accomplished a few things today like laundry and showering and even the 15 minutes of exercise. Start small and work you way up to bigger things. It's a good feeling isn't it to see work that you have set out to do and then you did it!! Good for you. I know the grass always seems greener ... but I wish I had a few weeks of vacation right now. I'm so tired. But I can understand how that big, yawning time period can feel overwhelming. Does your T...Read More...

For clarification - I find it easier to accept there is no manual on how to exactly fix myself (auto mechanic idea). What frustrates me more at this point is the lack of clarity, structure, manual, on therapy itself. That there is no way of knowing how therapy is proceeding, if it is progressing, if there is the alliance thingy going on, etc. The books seem to always blame the client for regressing, transferring and resisting, for therapy not working, except in cases of blatant professional...Read More...

Hi Masimo, This was a good way to get started. Actually a while back we had a couple of threads on what people wanted on the forums and possible changes. I've been derailed from doing anything about due to an extremely busy work schedule which is very nearly complete. After I have a chance to catch my breath I was going to re- read everyone's input and try to implement some changes, but I would definitely like a chance to think through the design and what will work. Adding a domestic abuse...Read More...

Yeah, that was my assumption too, but it's good to make that clear, for sure.Read More...

So glad you feel like you have a good dynamic with this new T. I hope you'll keep us updated!!!Read More...

Hi sea-green, So glad you have found somewhere that might suit your circumstances. It's ok to go to counseling when it suits you...even if you go only when you need that extra support - it's good to be able to reach out when you need to. Nice to see you have posted again Take care, Faith xxRead More...

Kashley I can totally relate to that feeling of utter exhaustion after a session, sometimes I have to concentrate so hard to simply drive home. Occasionally I have to go to workor a meeting shortly after my session and I find it really hard to step out of the difficulties of the session and into a worls whre everything seems surreal for a while. The post session headache is a real downer, mine often start in session and typically last for most of that day or the next. I think the only thing...Read More...

Puppet - thank you. I wish I intellectually understood how talking to someone would help me stop feeling terrible when I know there is rationally nothing wrong. I probably do not trust them when they tell me therapy can help and is proceeding as it should. It seems to me to be a bit like asking a butcher if it is okay to eat meat.Read More...

I'm going to take DF's suggestion and close this thread. Sadly if you wish to discuss this further, could you please open a new thread? Thanks, sorry for the inconvenience. AGRead More...

I was put on Seroquel when I went in-patient for 12 days last December. It was my "mood stabilizer" and due to it knocking me out cold, was taken at night. Within 30 minutes of taking it, I'd be out cold, literally. My dosage was 300/night. As soon as I started it my sleep was disturbed horribly. Bad nightmares, so vivid, like I was awake in my sleep. It was awful. I also got horrible SI once I was home for a few weeks. My P switched me from Seroquel 300 to Symbyax 6/12. The change was...Read More...

Hi AG - the new layout looks good to me, especially the Welcome section! Thanks for all your work AG, expecially when you're flat out at work!! Take care, MorgsRead More...

I feel that my view that 90 minutes is a good standard time and only run over when there is mega stuff being processed, has been affirmed here by you guys - so thankyou. I am not sure I will tell him because I look back and remember telling him before and it just gets awkward keeping on telling him and he is doing the lengthening of sessions in my best interests, but I have finished a session myself, I just get my shoes on and that signals " enough!"Read More...

(((JD))) Good for you standing up for yourself. I'm sorry it is happening though and that it hurts.Read More...

Oh gosh, thanks everyone for your very valuable perspectives and insights. I have to run out and don't have a lot of time to reply but wanted to tell you puppet that it didn't bother me in the least that you talked about you .. I like listening to other peoples stories and how they relate. It's interesting and helpful. I will be back later to reply more. Oh, by the way, in this vein, I told my T yesterday that I felt like a hamster on a wheel. He told me that he wants me to see myself as a...Read More...

ok so this is a seriously belated thank you - but just wanted to say thanks to you all, as your responses are helpful even now when I'm struggling with this again. thanks so much! it helps to not be so alone in all of this.Read More...

Thanks Freud, You gave me hope and a smile. LieseRead More...

You know what get sme going? I am cheap! If I don't cancel my app't with 48 hours notice I still pay for a session. I pay $100.00 per session and have no insurance coverage. Even if I avoid the subject for an hour I still go and talk about other things. CNCRead More...

Thanks AG!!! I'll probably come back to this in a couple of days. Thanks everyone for being patient w/ me too.Read More...

It is unusual to be offered a lift whilst one's T goes to get coffee, but it the t is a good T, there might be reasons that the T thought of that it would be a GOOD idea to do that, ie help you see him as a normal person. Also make you feel at ease. I guess only time will tell, like how you and he work together and how you look back on it, in years to come. Also I liked the T who offered a lift home, that was a real act of kindness and I am glad that it was accepted. Yea.Read More...

BB, I'm dwelling on what you said. I also forgot to say that no, I do not feel an attachment to my current T. What you are describing is what my 1st T was working on with me. We were working on assertiveness and saying to others what I need. I'm too non-confrontational. This new T was just there to help me through the transference. He never picked up where the last T left off and thats what I need now. I wish I had been more assertive when I got the boot. All I did was nod my head while my...Read More...

DGU, The truth is that child abuse is so horrible that a lot of people fail to see it because it's too painful to face, which is no excuse for how you were failed. You have every right to be angry about how unprotected you were. That you were allowed to suffer while so many around you did not see your pain. Like BG, I have promised myself to not look away because I know how much I wish someone would have seen me and done something. I hope that you can find solace now in being heard. AGRead More...

thanks for the great responses everyone! im still processing through this but will respond more when i can (stupid splinted hands) jdRead More...

Appreciate the input I received here and I'm really sorry if I made anyone feel like they caused me any problems. It's all my own stuff, not anyone's fault.Read More...