Thanks for your reply, Ninn. We took a break for a while, now he would like to continue back with EMDR. But, like he says, it is always "my call" as far as what kind of modality we do in therapy. He thought getting in touch with my "parts" would be a good thing to do before the next round of EMDR, to make sure all of my parts are up to continuing EMDR. I guess the parts modality is Internal Family Systems work. That's a new modality for me, too. You know, "All Parts Welcome," as they say.Read More...

(((liese))) Thank you, that helps me so much to know that, it cuts through my shame storm It is amazing how short a time the wrong T can leave a trail of damage I remember telling T2 that exT only had 20 hours with me and so much harm resulted. Less than one day!! But again, thank you for helping me not feel so ashamed of all thisRead More...

My T is a real stickler about eye contact. If I don't look at him he insists that I do. In the very beginning it was almost impossible and even though I would turn my head towards him my eyes would go out of focus so I couldn't see him. Now sometimes when he insists I look at him I will say NO. But most times I look because I do get more information and feel more connected when we hold eye contact. TNRead More...

Will do LongRoad, its working for me and tying in with T who use’s mindfulness in sessions. ChezzaRead More...

Hi MsC, Thanks for your reply. It really is interesting and fortunate to learn that well into our adult years we still have the ability to lay down new neural pathways and affect changes to our behavior. I'm now facing the most difficult part of my therapy. Realizing how my alcoholic father really messed me up during my childhood. To answer your question my T doesn't specialize in PTSD/trauma per-say, but she does specialize in aspects directly connected with it (anxiety, depression,...Read More...

I, too, enjoyed the article and very much agreed with it. I know the quality of my relationship with my T is extremely important to me and very healing. Yesterday, we had a fairly light session in which we talked about writing and the artistic temperament (my favorite subjects). There was discloser on both sides, and I left the session feeling warmly connected. I also left wondering if my T felt he was going a bit over the line, because at one point he very abruptly brought the conversation...Read More...

"The client sees the theorists actions as disproportionally magnified" oh how much I relate to that. I don't have DID but I still feel the article explains how I feel and the struggles I have / are having in therapy. For the first time I seem to be finally working with a T who is AWARE of how super-sensitive I am - other Ts have inadvertently caused further harm and further trauma and shame, by some if the things they've said or done (due to my disproportional responses).Read More...

The baby couldn't have survived anyway as it had no food (milk) milk I watched it all the way to the end anyway - but it was pretty awful :/Read More...

Getting back to the public mode, or work mode, was hard for me. I was so turned in I could hardly drive, much less deal with the public. But it did help to get into some red-faced anger about something or other, while I was driving down the road after session. I think of something to generate real anger a few minutes, and it grounded me, made me switch into protector mode, and fierce reality. The inner child is pushed back to hide behind my skirts, so to speak, and lets me get on with the...Read More...

That was facinating BLT. I found particularly interesting the spread of Anorexia in China. I don't have the same presenting ideas of many younger folks that suffer with this but most clinicians keep wanting to put me "in that box" so to say. Thanks for posting this. JillannRead More...

Yeah, same goes with me, but as you said everybody is different. Not all the services provided by a Online therapist are bad but some are. It is really a tricky part to choose the right TRead More...

Went to therapy today and showed T a picture of a little girl that I feel represents my Inner Child at two. I talked about the girl looking kinda frail and vulnerable, then T talked about how bad it is for adults to hurt a child. T opened the door so wide I couldn't help walking in. I described what I said her in the post about my aunts shouting at me "I'm not your Mother". Hopefully T will understand why I have so much trouble talking about dependency, and help me talk more. I know she was...Read More...

My T is a big fan of Kohut and I have tried to read some of his writings. It's funny because in the beginning I routinely accused my T of not having any empathy and not being able to show empathy to me. It really was there all along but I was so defensive and traumatized from my last disastrous T experience I could not see or experience it. Hi hope4.... I think that quote describes attunement. Welcome to the Board. TNRead More...

Very interesting article, RT. Now I'm off to take the quiz!Read More...

((eme)) Thank you, I am very glad it came across that way. And I know you to have done amazing things and will continue to do so.Read More...

statistics are fun (I don't know the much, though)Read More...

That totally explains my T's treatment of me. I can see what she is doing now. I don't know if that is good or bad. I obviously have a long way to go. Self Compassion is a pipe dream at this moment. She was trying to convince me that I am important enough to express my feelings in my relationships. I am so fearful of others reactions I constantly try to manage everyone elses feelings and only express positive feelings myself. AG I identify more with the recuer role given my position taking...Read More...

glad you enjoyed it too, Morgs and Chezza.Read More...

(((Turtle)))) I hope so too. TNRead More...

Damn!! I has this whole thing written out to Cat and Peng now it's gone!! Come on! Ugh Firstly let me say that I am turtle but now I have an s on the end of my name, (turtles) The reason for this is that I asked shrinklady to remove my account because I was so ashamed etc. Now that you guys have verified that things didn't go as badly as I suspected I wanted to keep my account but shrinklady was being a good forum stewardess and removed my account as I had requested. My fault entirely! Cat,...Read More...

i like this thread -- lots of good stuff in it. good soul food. please dont delete or feel need to apologize anyone. thank you for starting this turtle and all the others who have contributed.Read More...

You are a great help Starlight! As it turned out it was a long interview. You helped me sort of realize that it wasn't necessarily an IQ test and could be an interview so it didn't throw me of so much when they started doing it.Read More...

(((turtle))) i hear your pain and your fear and i'm so sorry you feel so alone and i can't believe that stupid person at the crisis line! i've also had mixed experiences with calling help lines, once i got someone who probably meant well but kept telling me to go and talk to 'someone', but they were the 'someone' i had called!! we are here and won't tell you to go away! gentle hugs, puppetRead More...

I haven't written here in a long time but this particular thread really struck a chord with me. I have worked through a lot in the almost 2 years I've been seeing T. For a long time there was this intense attachment/transference that I could not let go of. I felt I NEEDED to be near her, to be close to her, to KNOW her constantly and deeply. And knowing I could not was what made it a thousand times worse. Now, I have worked hard and am largely over this intense feeling, but I have a...Read More...