....more like 100 strikes and you're still not out with me. My father, brother and his wife are awful and use innocent children in their games. While I don't necessarily "fall for it" anymore - I still allow them to use me. I've read many books and have had numerous conversations with T about them and the complex trauma I suffer from all of it. My entire life my father would blame me for his wrong-doings and get people to believe him because he's so "charming". My mother always believed him. I started believing the lies myself and questioned sanity for years - "was it really just me losing my mind?" I would ask myself. How can they lie so easily about things and completely deny the truth?

While I have a lot of knowledge now about psychopaths and being the victim of several, it still hurts. I can logically know they have no capacity for true caring, it still hurts to feel like your family hates you and can use you like a pawn in their twisted games.