My ex C (the awful one who terminated with me by EMAIL.) well she let me email her and she slowly got to resenting it deeply and it was a mess.

I would send stuff that I could not say and hope she would read it and she would sometimes and sometimes not. She also supported me deeply when I was away out of the country , via email. We were completely muddled up as there were no guidelines. I forget why she gave me email, oh - it was because I was away and wanted to tell her who a big event went. Then it sort of slipped and I used it more and she did not draw the boundary. So in the end I felt I had abused it and got punished. she was useless at both being clear about boundaries and also about stating how she felt before she got so resentful she could spit.

anyway, that so called 'therapeutic' relationship was incredibly damaging. She also read my blog, because I asked her to once and then she kept reading it and I did not know what to do about it. A real mess.

My present, professional, experienced, steady and sound psychologist once made the mistake of phoning me on his work mobile and I did last number retrieve and got it. Then one time when all hell had broken loose my husband texted him. Since then it sort of slipped in that I text him if I want him to phone me. He has never told me off for this. It works better as the reception often don't get my message via phone to him.

then I have started to just occasionally tell him via text that I miss him and he sends a text back saying he is there. that can keep me going for a day or more. Then I sometimes - four times? - have pummlled him via text, and he has been kind and said ' sorry you are having a hard time." We seem to understand each other.

I have often thought if he wonders about the texting going on, but he has never said anything.

He does ask me to keep in mind that we are hoping to head towards me not needing a phone call each week in between sessions but I have not managed that yet. I DO know I am supposed to be heading towards that but I just feel it is so way out of my league right now that it is ridiculous to even hope. I just cannot make it more than three days ... if I try to everything escalates. I point that out to him and he agrees that he prefers me to text or contact him than have me arrive at a session all worked up and upset and we have to kind of working on all that first. A bit like what TN's T said.

He also knows I know his email address. I have never used it. He has never offered. I give him articles etc printed out. I think I am taking over his life enough as it is, he probably thinks "Enough already!"