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Originally posted by Affinity:

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He wants me to talk to him about difficult things in person and I try to talk to him via texting when things are too difficult to discuss. He won't allow this.

Oh, boy, can I relate. My T has a "no text, no email" policy, and isn't terribly keen on phone calls, either. As he explained, it's not necessarily about his dislike of outside contact. It's that discussing things in person is much more effective for both T and client. In person, there's a lot less room for misunderstanding and unmet expectations. I can (and do) write letters to him on occasion, but the rule is I bring them to session for either him or myself to read aloud. It was extremely difficult to adhere to this policy at first, but it has gotten easier over time.

That is my understanding too as to why some Ts don't allow txt / email contact - it's very difficult to ascertain 'tone' and the real meaning can be lost or not heard - which would potentially cause more pain for the client.

Although in this case - it's easy to see how it's caused pain due to a series of events ....

I am allowed to email my T - BUT it's with the clear understanding; it's not for therapy WORK - I can email her what I thinking and feeling, BUT we will talk about it at our next session face to face. She is clear she cannot write lengthy replies (and won't 'go into' therapy via email).

But in situations like you've described TAS - where y just need your T to know some things you find too hard to talk to face to face initially, and where yu simply just want to be able to share what's important to you without the expectation of a reply I think being able to email could be helpful.

Hope you're doing ok today (((TAS))) - I admire yr courage and self talk and insight into the why of feeling the way you do. sending y safe hugs across the Ocean