I actually just had to email her that I have to postphone this 'saying good things' session (the session was my idea, trying to make the best of a bad job)
but I have to be at a conference earlier than I expected so cannot make Weds. I have asked to meet with her the following week but may not - need more time to think about this.
I feel so deeply hurt by her, but I know that will fade in time.
She feels absolutely professional - from her point of view she is an 8 - 12 week session counsellor who sees people for current life issues or mild depression. I have major trauma and attachment issues which only surfaced once I started seeing her and she has ended with me because I am out of her remit. she feels she is well in order. HOW she did it, she will not look at. She will NOT let in any understanding of how utterly painful and shocking it has been for me. She just won't and can't. She just sighs or gets annoyed with me for being so upset about it. That from my point of view we were working til the end, and from her point of view she could terminate when ever she felt she was out of her depth and then tell me she was in her depth.
urgh

anyway, I don't want to start getting annoyed again.

I have already written to her an email saying what I appreciated and I have also given her a letter saying thank you and being magnanimous and gracious about how she has helped me. I was hoping she would give ME an affirming session - but I am not sure she is up to that.

sigh.

and yes, sexual abuse from a T is devastating. I got him struck off and all my money back. I was in such a state after that, and I never got another T til this latest C. Sigh.

They are all fallible - it is just that I seem to bring out their worst side.

My ex T of 1988-9 never hurt me intentionally and never really did anything too wrong - she just loved me back to as much wholeness as I could manage at the time.

Just hope and pray I find someone who can handle me, I find myself warning them all