Hi AG and Shrinklady,
Thanks for responding to my plea.

I don’t think for one minute that she strategically set this up, but it happened. She did clarify that it was not her intention for me to feel that way, and she did not use a tone to indicate that either. She just said it and I ran with it. Going back to what I know to be true is, she is right. I want to believe that she would never do that to be hurtful. She has told me that she does not “test” me or create agendas for therapy. I do believe her. My fear is that she is frustrated with me. Otherwise wouldn’t she have taken just a quick moment to say in a warm soothing tone, “No, I didn’t mean it that way.” It would have made such a difference.

Yes, I am still hurt and I will discuss this with her tomorrow. This can’t keep happening. Funny how you mentioned something similar, but while I was waiting for my chiro appt. I jotted this down; “I am confused as to when I can trust my feelings and when I cannot. When am I projecting and when am I reading others correctly? How can I know the difference?” (As AG mentioned above, you ask, right?) So I asked or mentioned how her statement made me feel. Where did that get me? She never used a snippy tone, but was very matter of fact. I needed warmth and reassurance and I don’t believe it would have taken that much more of her time to do so.

What I meant about her "brilliance" is that when she recognized what did come up, she did not try to sooth it away, but allowed me to experience the pain from where it originally comes from. I know she wants for me to know that "we always have opportunity to work things out and we will."

I want to indulge in something for a minute Shrinklady. You referred to counter transference. My T has mentioned before that when her children were nearing the time to move away to college that the way they dealt with their grief of leaving home was to be critical of everything she did. She said, “It is easier to leave angry rather than face the grief.” Another time she made an off the cuff remark in reflection to her relationship w/ her children “I never do anything right.” Both times they fit the surroundings of what I was experiencing in my relationship with her and I wondered then if she was allowing her issues to come into play. I know it is hard not to get emotionally involved w/ a client that might strike a chord w/ you. Do you think this is what she has done?