Thank you for your comments. It’s encouraging to know that I’m not the only one who feels like this... I just need to be more patient with myself I guess.

LTF – “ ..., I let my guard down a little, then things hit a little too close to home so it goes back up. And the cycle continues ".

I think that is could also be part of my “stuck” problem at the moment . About a month or so ago, my T casually mentioned one day that he was thinking about taking a job in another part of the country (which he didn’t – possible crisis averted!) but I was truly shocked at the feelings that this stirred up in me – some feelings I don’t think I even realized that I had! I got up the courage to tell him about it and we talked about what could be the problem and we are still working on some of the things that this brought about. I think that I am feeling that if I trust him too much, and let my guard down with him, he will leave (even though he assured me that he would never just up a go), just like other people in my life have. It really is a vicious circle...

QG is right when she says that I have a good T – I think so too. I can definitely see some progress being made over this last year. I guess I just have to dive off that board (trust) and hope for the best. I guess it’s really a leap of faith...

MP