MP,
I don't know that much about your background so this may be way off, but you mentioned abandonment issues.

What I have learned through my relationship with my T that I was really unaware of before working with him is that moving close to someone evokes a lot of fear and a desire to head in the other direction because it turned out so badly before. As we let down our guard and start to trust, our relationship template know as our attachment style, kicks in and tells us we're in danger and need to move away. So his mentioning he would be moving would trigger a pretty intense response because he is providing a secure base that you didn't have before. When we are accessing those emotions they carry with them a life and death intensity which magnifies all of our reactions.

So we get caught in what my T calls the bind. We are naturally drawn to connection because that's how humans get their needs met, but moving too close creates an incredible sense of putting ourselves in danger. So we are forced to walk into the heart of our fear so that we can experience something different with our T enough times to relearn that going closer isn't dangerous. It can be very hard work and go very slowly but it is worth it in the end.

AG