Quell... reading a post like this from you is what makes all the writing and explaining about what I go through in this process so worthwhile. It makes me so excited to know that you bravely went into your T and read him part of your journal and dared to ask him those very scary questions. I am very happy to know that reading here has helped you to understand attachment, relationships with T's and that your feelings are quite normal for what you have experienced in your life and that it's okay to talk about all of this with your T.

Quell you were already brave because you were already in therapy and therapy is not for wimps. We just supported and encouraged you. And yes, you will hate some of this but in the end it will be very rewarding as you heal and grow.

A few questions... is your T experienced? What modality does he use in therapy? Is he psychodynamic or CBT or eclectic or something else? My T is not very warm and fuzzy at times either but he is very committed to my healing and he is a good, ethical T. I'll bet as you delve further into this with your T you will see more fuzziness! I really look forward to hearing more about your T and your journey with him.

TN