quote:

When I tell you that IS childish please understand that is completely acceptable and age appropriate with where you are at in therapy. Outside of therapy you are I am just as certain, a responsible, level headed adult taking care of many responsiblities. In therapy we have room to nurture and give voice to our inner child that craves the sort of attention you mention, as well as love and reassurance we need and that's ok.

LoS

What JM says here is so important. I have struggled so hard with this and I still do. It just made no sense to me that I should have these childish feelings as I'm a grown adult and these are inappropriate to me. My T has explained many times that it is appropriate in therapy because these are the feelings that did not get addressed or validated or whatever when I was a child and I need to experience them now in order to work through them. It is scary and painful, but little by little I think I will get through them. I also told my T that I thought I was making things up just to get her attention. In my mind, I still have that fear that if I get better, she won't want to waste her time with me anymore. Again, all of this relates to my childhood where my feelings weren't taken seriously or validated.

Interesting that your T asked you about what you wear. I never gave this much thought before, but I ALWAYS plan what I put on for work on the days I have therapy. It is important to me that I look good for her. When you figure out what this means, let me know.

This whole relationship with our T's can be so overwhelming, painful and loving. I guess for me, it just depends on what is going on at the moment as to which emotion I am feeling. Right now I'm loving her with all my heart as she is really supporting me through some pretty difficult stuff, but who knows what next week will bring. As difficult and painful as it is to tell some things to our T's, it really does bring relief afterwards. (says the biggest chicken of the year!)

PL