Ok...thanks OW.

So it's phileo (brother to brother or friendship) type of love. I can certainly relate to that. In thinking about ending my long-term relationship with my T. I am experiencing that same type of problem. It's not that I want to be her "best friend" but I would like to have some kind of contact with her after termination. (On the other hand...If I were to actually sit down over a cup of coffee with her. I wonder what would I talk to her about? I know very little about her personal life. Maybe we have nothing in common to promote a friendship. hmmmm)

It sounds like what you really want to do is alter the power structure of your relationship. (This is probably my projection here.) We come to them for their expertise and then resent them for having it and owning it. Hmmmmm....
I think it's very hard for T's to contemplate changing the power structure in a therapy relationship and in fact some T's believe doing that contaminates the holding environment. So...the client no longer feels safe with the T. There are so many things a T has to consider before they alter the structure of the therapeutic milieu. I've had this discussion with my T more than once.

I have some issues with authority and continue working on that. Most of my abuse issues are attached to authority figures in my life. So, I am uncomfortable and resistant when I feel her assertion of power over me. It's hard to find a balance there.

SD