quote:

Originally posted by Provocative Girl:

For example: a child who is "diminished and put down" might grow into an adult who seeks sexual activity with many partners. They transfer their inbuilt and well hidden need for love (from their childhood journey) into the acceptance they get from an intimate engagement with a lover.

Yepp, that’s me. (Was me)


I’ve been thinking about this topic in general a lot during my last 8 months of celibacy. I know so much of what I don’t want, and so little of what a healthy relationship with real love actually looks like. I know I’ve never seen it. No one in my family has healthy relationships. So I felt like it was basically impossible to know what to look for in a relationship.

I feel like the “Solutions to the Lower Mind Attachments in Relationship” and also the “few thoughts…” actually gave me goals and something to strive for. I’m going to try and find more on this subject, because now I feel like I know what I want, and not only what I don’t want in a relationship.

While I was reading the article I kept finding myself saying, “SO TRUE!” Being attached instead of in love is one of those things that no one wants to be honest with themselves about, but if you think about it, it’s “so true”.

quote:

2. You only want what you haven't got. So, attachment means that this person you are attached to has something you need or want. But you have everything, you are everything, so it's just that you think their "bundle" is better than your "bundle" - that's a lie, a self corruption.

Absolutely love this. It’s very spiritual and existential. I had this quote on my fridge for awhile, “You can relax because everything you could ever want or be you already have and are”. The existential aspect of that quote reminded me of the one from the article. The quote is from the movie I Heart Huckabee’s.

Thanks again, PG, for posting this!

Thanks for posting this, PG. It was a really interesting article and touched on some stuff that my T and I talked about today. I needed to read it, especially the second quote Maclove put in her post above. All of it, really. Thanks again!

MTF