Hi, guys...I alsp deal with memory problems...sometimes, I think, I remember in a normal way, other times, it feels like I never really was born at all I remember so little. I also deal with a very strange sense of time, that part I find very disturbing, and embarrassing and scary. I try, not to think about all of this most of the time, and when I do, I can't stop the crying and feeling "screwed up." But then I realize, everyone has problems, not just me...and it is all onsome kind of continuum...what is normal? A girl I know who have schizophenia for real, are ompletely functional most of the time, although a bit out of it at times due to medication, and at times in and out of hospital. But, I compare myself to her, and she has it more "together" than I do. So what is normal? I think sometimes, diagnoses are just a way to put people into into categories that make sense, but that they don't really say anything at all about the person. So I don't really worry about being screwed up, or whatever anymore. Because the only reason in my mind for those types of categorizations, is for people to be able to compare people to eachother, and who really cares? Does this make any sense? In other words, I think it is vastly UN-dramatic to have DID, or mental disorder, or depression, or wh are just patever, because people are just people and if someone wants to judge based on how mentally sound someone is rather than on what kind of a person they are, than, well...are they really worth to have as a friend anyway? Maybe crazy thinking, but I don't know...just my thoughts, take or leave...


BB

I have huge losses in memory, feeling of time being warped or unreal etc. I also have DID, however, nobody in my daily life would have a clue and you would never know if you met me. I'm high functioning, master's level educated and married long term with children who are all very well adjusted. So, I agree with BB, these labels are just labels and in the end we are people not diagnoses.

However, I didn't mean that in any way to diminish what we all go through with our various problems and sufferings...in that sense, it IS dramatic, and deserving of compassion, love, and support...kwim, though?

Love,

BB

I have really clear childhood memories, some ridiculously clear in detail from about age 4 onwards...but there are other important things that I have no memory of at all as a child. My T also says that she's tried to ask me questions about certain aspects of my childhood over the years, when we talk about some of those questions and my answers now, I have no recolllection of the discussion taking place previously. I realise that they are the most difficult trauma memories that I don't want to remember...but it feels very odd. My memory is usually really reliable.

starfish

quote:

Originally posted by blackbird:
However, I didn't mean that in any way to diminish what we all go through with our various problems and sufferings...in that sense, it IS dramatic, and deserving of compassion, love, and support...kwim, though?

Love,

BB

Oh yes, I totally agree, but I really detest the labels. We aren't a diagnosis. We are people and those issues wouldn't be there if not for a reason. Those reasons are dramatic and definitely deserving of compassion, love and support.

I'm sorry UV...I didn't mean that I thought YOU, were particularly concerned with labels...I guess I was trying to somehow point out that it could be a reason for being worried about this damage. I guess I was trying to say that we are ALL of us permanently damaged, just in different ways...now, isn't that a cheery thought, UV? I'm sure I've made you feel much better. I hope you understand the sense I mean this in, though...It IS scary to feel like you might come unhinged or lose yourself. I get that, and I didn't intend to minimize it at all!

BB

on that note, my dbt t said that 'all of us' have features and traits of personality disorders...i looked shocked at her, she said, "yes, most people are a little bit narcissistic, or a little ocd, or paranoid, or something." i was still so shocked to hear that, that i didn't really commment, i don't know her aim, probably to impart truth...i don't think she was lying, just kind of normalized 'my issues' a bit. she did agree that i have borderline issues...but not full blown disorder.

not where i want to be, but, that is where i am. i sure wish i knew other people like this. i feel so alone. she said i would not 'fit' with her groups, and i will go with that, and maybe it would be damaging for me to participate, maybe we would just revel in our disturbances or something, but i do feel that way.

anyway, just thought i'd throw that bit, that everyone has a little bit of something going on...jill