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Hi Permafrost,
I don't think it's too personal to post. What an interesting series of dreams. I'm a dream novice so take what I say with a grain of salt. It sounds like you were frightened and you wanted comforting. T was there to comfort you but you were not comfortable yet letting her comfort you. Is that too simplistic?
I remember being really distressed at home - not during a session - when I was still with my OldT. I had the feeling that I wanted a hug from her. It struck me as being odd. I kept asking myself, is this what will heal me? A hug from her? Do I need to ask her to hug me? I never did discuss it with her because it just never got that far.
Since I'm with new T there have been many times when I've wanted "comfort" from him. Again, it usually happens at home when I'm in emotional pain. I want to share my pain or fear with him and have him reassure me that everything is okay but I can never do it. I don't know about you but in my FOO, we didn't share emotional pain nor did we get comfort for our emotional pain. Sometimes I just think that maybe wanting that hug from my T or that comfort is an emotional need that was never met as a child and that is why it is so painful and scary. It seems as though somes T's touch and others don't. But regardless of whether they do or don't, wanting to be comforted when you are scared or in pain is a very normal and human need. For the T's who don't touch, they probably find other ways to be comforting whether they do it verbally or nonverbally or both.
I don't know if they resonates with you but I have had similar experiences with being sad or scared, wanting to be comforted, being afraid to share it and receive it.
Liese
I don't think it's too personal to post. What an interesting series of dreams. I'm a dream novice so take what I say with a grain of salt. It sounds like you were frightened and you wanted comforting. T was there to comfort you but you were not comfortable yet letting her comfort you. Is that too simplistic?
I remember being really distressed at home - not during a session - when I was still with my OldT. I had the feeling that I wanted a hug from her. It struck me as being odd. I kept asking myself, is this what will heal me? A hug from her? Do I need to ask her to hug me? I never did discuss it with her because it just never got that far.
Since I'm with new T there have been many times when I've wanted "comfort" from him. Again, it usually happens at home when I'm in emotional pain. I want to share my pain or fear with him and have him reassure me that everything is okay but I can never do it. I don't know about you but in my FOO, we didn't share emotional pain nor did we get comfort for our emotional pain. Sometimes I just think that maybe wanting that hug from my T or that comfort is an emotional need that was never met as a child and that is why it is so painful and scary. It seems as though somes T's touch and others don't. But regardless of whether they do or don't, wanting to be comforted when you are scared or in pain is a very normal and human need. For the T's who don't touch, they probably find other ways to be comforting whether they do it verbally or nonverbally or both.
I don't know if they resonates with you but I have had similar experiences with being sad or scared, wanting to be comforted, being afraid to share it and receive it.
Liese
Hi Frosty
I read your dream post but didn't have time to reply and now it is gone so i hope my memory serves me correctly.
For me dreams are not always completely literal and as i was reading it i remeber thinking it might be more about the discomfort you feel in getting close to your T and not necessarily about hugging and the physical touch per se. If i recall correctly in the dream you liked your T's touch but also wanted to run away... Sounds like therapy to me.
Therapy is all about the conflicts and trying to figure them out, so i would think it is more about what a hug represents in terms of comfort or safety or whatever it means to you than just wanting a hug from your T. It is the yearning for something that you should work with, what is it you want, what are you needing?
I know how vulnerable it can feel to have things like this pop up in dreams but dreams like this are so important and can give great insight if you let them. Of course i am going to say i think you should try and talk to your T about it
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Sorry it took so long to reply.
Pan
I read your dream post but didn't have time to reply and now it is gone so i hope my memory serves me correctly.
For me dreams are not always completely literal and as i was reading it i remeber thinking it might be more about the discomfort you feel in getting close to your T and not necessarily about hugging and the physical touch per se. If i recall correctly in the dream you liked your T's touch but also wanted to run away... Sounds like therapy to me.
Therapy is all about the conflicts and trying to figure them out, so i would think it is more about what a hug represents in terms of comfort or safety or whatever it means to you than just wanting a hug from your T. It is the yearning for something that you should work with, what is it you want, what are you needing?
I know how vulnerable it can feel to have things like this pop up in dreams but dreams like this are so important and can give great insight if you let them. Of course i am going to say i think you should try and talk to your T about it
. Sorry it took so long to reply.
Pan
I think that explains it beautifully! 
The super intimate is the awkwardness and um, er, that would be 'Therapy in a nutshell'. Well for me anyway.
It is always hard to know whether we have real issues with a T or if we really are making up excuses as the discomfort gets unbearable. It is the push-pull bind AG often talks about, (AG where are you?...) wanting to move closer but being terrified of the expected hurt that the vulnerablity of intimacy brings.
Frosty, it is difficult and embarrassing and a whole lot more but dreaming about it shows that your subconscious is already changing and growing and that new ideas and experiences are already happening for you. Honestly, i doubt i would have the courage to talk to my T about something like that either, it was just one of those things i think i am supposed to say
I found the intimacy of therapy excrutiating, i told my T once that i felt like a belly up dog in his room all exposed and vulnerable and i hated it. And the awkwardness for me came from wanting safety, comfort and acceptance from someone when i was not completely sure how they felt about me and all my usual rules of how to conduct myself weren't applying.
Anyway, the bottom line is just keep showing up for therapy and let the process happen in its own time at at its own pace. You will get there. Love
Pan
The super intimate is the awkwardness and um, er, that would be 'Therapy in a nutshell'. Well for me anyway.It is always hard to know whether we have real issues with a T or if we really are making up excuses as the discomfort gets unbearable. It is the push-pull bind AG often talks about, (AG where are you?...) wanting to move closer but being terrified of the expected hurt that the vulnerablity of intimacy brings.
Frosty, it is difficult and embarrassing and a whole lot more but dreaming about it shows that your subconscious is already changing and growing and that new ideas and experiences are already happening for you. Honestly, i doubt i would have the courage to talk to my T about something like that either, it was just one of those things i think i am supposed to say
I found the intimacy of therapy excrutiating, i told my T once that i felt like a belly up dog in his room all exposed and vulnerable and i hated it. And the awkwardness for me came from wanting safety, comfort and acceptance from someone when i was not completely sure how they felt about me and all my usual rules of how to conduct myself weren't applying.
Anyway, the bottom line is just keep showing up for therapy and let the process happen in its own time at at its own pace. You will get there. Love
Pan