I spend a lot of time alone and have the opposite problem...I have difficulty not being alone. However, this all stems from abandonment issues just as your issues seem to as well.

I'm spending a lot of time in therapy going back in memories, talking about those feelings of abandonment...actually feeling the pain that I felt back then. Its such difficult work, but I do think it is helping. I'm getting to the point where I can cry about being abandoned and those tears are healing, but it has taken me a lot of work to get to the point where I can cry about it. I honestly think this is my only way to work through it..to relive the pain, but to do so in the safety of my therapeutic relationship.

I struggle with aloneness and loneliness and am introverted too. I find myself actually feeling more lonely (which is painful) when I am with other people and just can't manage to connect (often the case) than I do when I'm alone. So, I actually prefer to be alone. Case in point is being disappointed my H isn't going on a trip, because I would have had so much alone time to myself, and in that time, I would not have felt so lonely. Bored, once in a while, maybe, but not disconnected (since he has reacted to my leaving the bed by withdrawing emotionally while simultaneously trying to force more time together, heightening my alone feelings). It is for this same reason I cannot stand "disconnected" session with T. I feel very lonely and abandoned, because I am there together with him, but I cannot really be with him, that is sense our connection, his perceiving and accepting of all of me.

I don't know. I am sounding a bit too existential here, I think. Does this make sense?

As to whether it gets better, I find when I am having success connecting with people (rather than avoiding or faking relationships), yes, it is much better and I do not dwell in these lonely feelings. However, getting to that connectedness is a lot of work and maintaining it even more and I don't quite have the skill set to do it with more than two or three people at the same time (if I'm lucky enough to manage that). One of those will ALWAYS have to be my Boo, one is usually my H, so it is difficult to not feel lonely if I do not have time to myself to recharge those interactive capacities...