((((((Frosty))))))
I'm at work now so time is limited - will talk with you soon - sending lots of care and hugs my friend.
Love, Morgs xx

Wow, Frosty. It sounds like a lot of stuff is coming up for you, after your last session with T.

quote:

They are the people most likely to stick with me when everyone else fails. I love them, they’re my parents. They haven’t done anything obvious wrong, they just… I don’t know. They didn’t know better.

Whenever I try to visualize my pain, there is nobody there. No person is ever there. I am either trapped in a room and run from wall to wall, not being able to escape. Or I am a bird flying in the wind and having nothing to rest on.

(((((Frosty)))) I know this place- this lonely trapped place. There is a way out, there is light and peace and joy and meaning that you can find in your life. But it just will take some time to find it, and to learn to let it in. That is no wrong.
Thanks for posting what you did. It was very sad to read, but I do think that you chose to leave your T because you were not getting what you needed there- and that is ultimately taking care of yourself. I know it feels better to take the blame, and to say it was me, it was my fault- because that would mean that the care you need was there, and that you could still choose to go back to it, so it provides some measure of security. But as I remember, you felt she was not really helping you. Sure she cares about you- but did not seem to have to tools or the insight to provide what you needed. Better to go somewhere where you feel really met, than to keep re-enacting something that didn't seem to be getting you what you needed to grow and live the life you want to live, that you deserve and need to live. I am sorry that your parents were not there for you int he way that they should have been. The kind of emotional invalidation that you deal with is really difficult to see, grasp, understand as wrong and abusive- let alone overcome it. It's like a shadow, and you can never really pin it down. You just know that something is not right, something is terribly wrong, and that it has and is affecting you all the time? It will take time and a very wise T to overcome this, and put the coping mechanisms aside. Go easy.

hugs,

BB

PF

I don't have a lot to offer other than I know how scary it can be to face the pain and I also know how it feels to feel as though you are alone in your pain.

(((((Frosty))))

(((((Frosty)))))

((Frosty)) Hope things are a bit better today.

(((((FROSTY)))))
I know you're hurting but please don't hide!!!
Love, Morgs xx

(((((Frosty))))))