Hmmmm...where and how to begin?!!
I finally decided to submit the requests for my adoption records to the Alberta gov't last October. What led to my finally doing this was the very tumultuous year I had with my adoptive parents. I won't go into all that under this post as I've already written about it in previous posts. Suffice it to say, though, my feelings of guilt for wondering about my birth family were replaced with feelings of anger. They simply did not understand why I needed to know about my beginnings and where and how I came to them.
Well, I am VERY happy to report that I received a life-changing call at 4:35 on Tuesday, January 14th. The Post Adoption Registry contact informed me I had 4 other birth siblings, two of which are twin sisters!!! Aaaaannnddd, they've actually been looking for me since 1985 and 1995, when they submitted their requests!!!! (Just to help put things into better context, my adoptive parents always told me I was the only one who survived the fatal car accident that claimed both my birth parents. I was supposedly raised in a catholic orphanage because there were no other living relatives to take me and I had no other siblings. For the last 40+ years, I was led to believe there was absolutely NO ONE else to take me!!)
I simply cannot begin to explain/describe the myriad of emotions I've been feeling this past month, everyone. To find out my birth sisters have been looking for me (they knew about me) since the mid 80s utterly and totally blows me away. No, I wasn't forgotten or left behind...even though that's the way I've felt all these years. That huge, black hole in my heart is ever so slowly turning a different colour.
I have since talked on the phone and skyped with one twin and exchanged my first email with the other one just this past weekend. I've also seen their pictures. OMG, but does the second one look like me, it's uncanny!!!
I also rec'd the first part of me adoption records. They came in the mail last week. I cannot convey how it felt to see details from that time in black and white in front of me for the very first time. It also includes words written in my birth mother's handwriting. Unreal...surreal...unbelievable....
Anyway, I just wanted to come back here and share my latest chapter of my adoption search with you all. I've done a bit of catching up here but I must admit, I have to take things in very small doses right now, otherwise I get overwhelmed very quickly and the emotional bank becomes depleted very quickly.
Take care everyone and I'll drop by a li'l later with a bit more info.
Sending warm hugs.
The Kid
