((((HELD))))

Good to see you around. Been missing you. I say go for it. It's causing you stress and so it would be therapeutic as well to talk about it. I'm sure she would want to help you with it. (At least, I hope she would want to help you with it.)

depends on her boundaries HIC. My T is a medical practitioner and while i might ask vague questions (eg good vitamins to take for a cold) most medical issues he encourages me to speak to my GP about. So she might answer some of your questions and concerns but also may encourage you to seek formal legal advice. Maybe start by saying you have a particular legal issue going on and its stressing you out psychologically. and that you know she's a lawyer but you're not sure what sort of advice she can give given you have a therapy relationship with her. that way you don't wave the contract at her and possibly get rejected and feel silly upfront. so my very long winded answer is - clarify the boundaries first and then the rest i imagine would be pretty self explanatory

Hi HIC ((hug))

I'm agreeing with what GreenEyes has to say, boundaries first then go from there. That's super awkward, but I can't think of another way around it other than through. I love to be awkward so I'd probably ask by saying something like 'Hey so since you're also a lawyer how much of my session time did you say we could use to sort out any legal issues I may have?' Then it's sort of like if I get shot down at least the conversation is upbeat and my T or I will find a well placed space for a joke that laughs away the awkward then we move on to something else (then I'll go home and think about it all. day. long.)... I've already got my T contracted out to carry bodies in to the forrest for me, should I come in to any because she has a pretty awesome SUV. That's sort of like offering a non-T service, right? At least if she can't help you perhaps she could refer you to someone reasonable or free...

I'm not sure if you have any sort of employer benefits, but many times Canadian and American companies will offer free legal consultation w/ a lawyer for a couple sessions. Might be worth it to look there too, depending on how major the issue is.

((Liese))
((RT))
((Green Eyes))
((Catalyst))

Thanks for sharing your perspectives and advice. I feel a little more comfortable about bringing it up now. I am planning on going about it round about as suggested. I will probably start with the "emotional" side of things-- how this is causing me stress, and I'm not sure what to do or what I can do. Then if T is seeming helpful, engaged, and interested I might mention that I don't quite understand part of the contract-- if the "contingency clauses" (there are a couple that are relevant here) cancel each other out or not. Then depending on how receptive she seems I'll ask if she's willing to look at it.

My feeling is she'll be fine with doing so and may even be tickled by the spectacle of me humbly admitting I can't read a simple contract and asking for help.

But we will see. I'll update later, now I need to go get ready for my session.

Thanks again, everyone. Lovely to "see" you all. I've missed interacting of late.

T was such a doll about reading the contract and being all lawyer like.

I had planned on going in and briefly explaining the situation in a few succinct sentences and then cautiously feeling her out on looking at the contract with me.

Instead, I went all excitable, ranting, hand gesticulating Sicilian upon opening the topic and spent a good chunk of the session indulging in declaiming my woes in dramatic volubility. Haha, I didn't even feel I had that in me, but I suppose I was more stressed and irritated than I realized, and occasionally that side of me comes out when I'm feeling like that.

It was cathartic, at any rate. T mostly commiserated, nodded, laughed, and smiled. She's actually the one who brought in the legal side of things, though. Because at one point I lamented, "The thing is, I've already *paid* these people" and she kind of snapped to attention. She said, "Did you sign a contract? What did they commit to in writing?"

I explained that I wasn't sure if I had an out or not, according to what was actually written in the contract. She asked if H had looked at it (lol, I suppose she was thinking at that point he'd have a clearer head than me). I told her that he had and he felt uncertain about it too.

T began to look very thoughtful, so I asked cautiously, "I don't know if maybe you'd be willing to read it and see what you think?"

And she said (very genuinely), "Yes, I was just about to say I'd be glad to look at the contract."

Awww. . . maybe she was waiting for me to ask because she thought it would seem nosy or patronizing to offer?

Anyway, she spent several minutes poring over it. She told me that it was worded ambiguously and some of that should have been clarified. But she also emphasized a few phrases according to which, (she said) I was not receiving the services that I was contracting for and paying for. She said that it would be very reasonable to ask for a refund and that if it went to court (unlikely, I don't think it's worth going to court over) I would have a case.

I thanked her very gratefully and said that that was what I had been unsure about, whether it was reasonable, according to the wording of the contract (not just our own minds) to ask for a refund. She said she definitely thought so. She even helped me a little on how I might compose an email to the people in question explaining all this and making my request.

She was such an angel about it. I think my T has a strong caretaking side to her. I felt like she was actually enjoying being helpful and "rescuing" me, rather than resenting the role as I slightly feared she might. She also seemed pleased that I was so appreciative.

In the end, this took up virtually all of our session, but it seems worth it. I feel better now, isn't that part of the point of therapy?

Well done HIC!
Glad it went well and T was so helpful!

Yay!!

What Cat said ^ Yay!