SO disappointing I hate hate hate when stuff like this happens. A couple weeks ago I REALLY needed to see my T but there was a snow storm and I wasn’t able to see him and it was horrible!! Planning to have a session and then having it canceled at the last minute. I’m sorry, Confuzzled. Hang in there.

I'm sorry Confuzzled (welcome by the way, I don't think we've met!). Having a session canceled at the last minute when you've been hanging on just to get to that point is so hard. I hope that you are taking care of yourself and can get by until your session.

Thanks everyone.

I managed to distract myself today and try to forget the hurt feelings that I had. I do have a crisis appointment booked for tomorrow but it is with a different T. I'm hoping it goes well but it is hard to start again with someone else, especially since I have been seeing T for over two years now.

I'm also trying to decide of whether or not I should email T to ask for an earlier appointment (even though it is not likely) and state some of my feelings about what happened. Do you guys this that that would be a smart thing to do or not?

If you normally email your T I think it would be a smart idea, but if T has a no email policy, then I wouldn't. If you aren't sure about what her policy is, my best advice is to email or call to ask for an earlier session, and say that you have some things that are really bothering you. I wouldn't start to use email to process stuff with your T, that is a landmine. Trust me from one who has gone that route- my T always kinda let me do this and kinda didn't let me do this, it was always kinda up in the air, and just lately he told me I can't email him about issues anymore again, I have to wait for sessions. It's sooo hard once you've gotten used to outside contact. It really hurts, to go back to normal after that. Also emailing about your feelings can easily turn into an avoidance of discussing them with your T in person, I guess that is the theory behind the no email thing. Hope this helps a bit! Hope you are hanging in there!

BB

I can understand why you have hurt feelings, but this time of year does get a little hectic for everyone. I know its hard not to take it personally, but try to recognize that its nothing personal. Perhaps you can use this as an opportunity to show your T how strong you are and can get through difficult times on your own, even though it is challenging. You can tell him how this made you feel and then share with him how you managed to cope with it despite it being difficult for you. He will be so proud of you!

Hang in there.

I really feel for you, having had my own P cancel cos of snow, so we had a nearly three week gap.
that was really tough and painful for me but at least `i had two phonecalls with him to help me still feel connected.
The email route is a landmine, I agree with BB - having had it cut off by my ex C after having used it for several months at some depth. It just can make you feel you were given care and then it was taken away.
but for a short email just requesting an earlier session if possible because you are finding things hard, I would think that is okay.
hang on in there and know you are feeling very normal feelings for the situation . Hugs.

Thanks everyone for your support and advice.

I did had another appointment with a new T (just a drop in appointment) which did help a bit (not as helpful as normal T but it did).

I was going through a rough time because I was off my medications for two weeks before starting on a new one but now I have the new meds so hopefully things will start to look up.

I decided not to email T but am just going to bring it up next time I have an appointment.

Hi,

No I have not had another appointment with T since this happened. I was able to get in to see someone else the next day but it was definitely not the same.

The problem I have with emailing T and asking for an earlier app't time is that the service is provided for me through my university and I don't have to pay for sessions (along with every other university student). And it is currently exam time and all of their app'ts have been filled.

I have been doing ok since the canceled appt so I think I might just leave it till the next one.

So I have my session with T on Thursday after it was canceled a few weeks back. Now I'm not sure how to act when I go in. It was not T's fault that she got sick, but it did affect me pretty severely. Do I ignore it and move on? I guess I don't really want to spend a chunk of the session on that.

Oh why do I get so nervous before each session.

Confuzzled,

I would recommend addressing it but you can always put a time limit on how much time you want to spend discussing it. My T recommended this recently as a possibility for me to make it easier to talk about difficult subjects, specifically some abuse that I endured as a child. She said I could say that I only wanted to talk for one minute about it and that she would respect that. Well I realized then that I wanted to spend a lot more than one minute on that subject. However, a few weeks later when I experienced a breakup with a new boyfriend, I did not want to spend a lot of my session talking about it so I told her up front that I only wanted to spend a few minutes on it but that I had other things I felt were more important to discuss. She completely respected this wish and allowed me to change the subject after telling her about the breakup briefly. It felt great to be able to address it without allowing it to dominate my entire session.

I hope that you are able to find something similar in being able to discuss things without allowing it take over the session. Good luck!

hope it went well today and you are very fortunate having therapy for free, i hope the session went well and you were able to say how it affected you, being cancelled on and also move on to other things if you needed to.