Some of you may remember my story of ending with my T of 2.5 years. Anyway, while I was reading one of my T training books biding my time until my son's session was over in the clinic, in walks my former T from lunch. We both said hello and our faces lit up! She sat down next to me in the waiting room and asked how things were going for me and my kids. That was sooo sweet, seeing as she is not my T anymore. It shows me that she does care and is genuine. I talked a bit, but didn't want to go into "client mode". I asked her how she was doing as well. Former T answered briefly and then went on to talk about the book I was reading. She talked about the T training classes that she teaches and what books they use in her school. Seeing as I knew there was going to be a possibility of running into former T that day, I printed off a book recommendation and some info about an upcoming T conference that I know she would be interested in. I gave those printouts to her and she thanked me for thinking of her. I responded quickly with, "I always think of you." I hope that didn't sound creepy.
T said a couple more things as in she had confidence that I was going to do well in my next semester of classes, and then she headed to her office. As she was walking down the hallway, I said goodbye and told her how nice it was to see her. Within about a minute she was back talking to me about a book that she had in her hand. At that point though my son was done with his session. Former T talked to my son and me for a few seconds longer and then it was goodbye.
I miss her! About then I was asking myself why I ever left her. ugh. I was ecstatic about seeing her just for those few minutes.
I keep thinking that I'm going to run into her out and about in the community seeing as I know where some of her hang outs are (she told me), but I haven't.
Last night I had an incredible dream about her. It was so wonderful!
She was mentoring and tutoring me. I went to her home office and she was asking me questions that were going to be on a national exam. She stuck straight with the questions for quite a while and then talked about herself and her life. It turned into a friendship chat. She asked how I was and I told her that I would talk about some things, but not my love life. In this dream we both agreed that that wasn't part of our relationship anymore. Then, she ended our tutoring session and said we could do it again sometime. I woke up from that dream feeling good and then it hit me that it was a dream and I won't be in her office again. Tears started streaming down my face!
I tried to go back to sleep to get back into a dream with her, but couldn't.
I think some of this had to do with a billboard I saw on my way home from work. About three blocks away from former T's office was a billboard that said something about January being National Mentoring Month. I thought about how former T was a mentor to me and she even said something about our relationship being more like a mentoring one at one point. Then, I drove close to her office on my way home. That made me think of her and our sessions too.
Well, seeing as I didn't get much sleep last night, I better see if I can get some tonight. Maybe I'll see former T in my dreams!
