Hi All:

I have been a long time browser, but am a first time poster.

I have been seeing my therapist for the last year or so for just basic life issues, nothing serious and I do not have a DSM diagnosis. I basically consider him a more qualified version of a life coach being that he is a PhD.

Since the beginning of therapy, I have always found him to be very interesting, smart, attractive etc. Basically, if I were to have met him at the gym, at a restaurant, anywhere outside of therapy, I would have been interested.

I have no issue with men and get plenty of attention and have plenty of friends to talk to about my life. I am suggesting that this isn't transference, because I really don't a) believe in that and b) thought he was attractive when I first met him before I even got to know him. He has made comments such as, "you don't me to reassure you that you are gorgeous and that you are in the top .01 percent".

Basically, my question is as follows; we have this great chemistry, but I would never do anything to violate boundaries and have no interest in doing that, but I also respect him immensely and feel that I don't always say EVERYTHING. I liken this to getting brazilian waxes (before laser--so much better btw!). I would never go to an attractive waxer, because I felt bad that they had to do something so shitty as be a waxer. I had no issue going to some fat, ugly person as I felt that it was par for the course for them.

I basically view my relationship with him as more of a friendship and a collaboration in making me the best version of myself that i can be and I am not sure that with our dynamic and chemistry that we can effectively work together.

Thoughts?