listened to the recording from last session. the thing that jumps out at me is the point where T says about A (daughter's boyfriend) "do we need to beat him up" after labeling A "a clown". and he goes on to say that teenage boys "need to be monitored and contained". because they have problems". This just really shocked me for 2 reasons: the first being he does a lot of work with teens, but his remarks sound a lot like an out-of-touch adult ... "this is your label, wear it well, and good luck emerging from the trenches i have placed you in". the second thing is he knows (or at one point knew) of the us/them mentality that has set me apart from adult life pretty much my whole life (i am 50). the comments just sounded righteously indignant, opposite of what i would expect from a person in his position. then to top it off, after i came to A's defense, T says "i was just kidding when i said we should beat him up". one of 2 phrases "x" frequently used to absolve himself of any responsibility was "i was just kidding". it hurts to write this because i know (or at least fantasize) that thest 2 men are on entirely different planes, but i think this is what therapy is. i think i need to share with T, but i also know that i write because i know i could never speak it. i dont' want to ever hurt anybody. anybody???