Oh Hummingbird!

My heart goes out to you. I no longer see or talk to my old T. I am so glad that you had a beautiful goodbye. Journal about it so you never forget what was said. Write down what you remember that she said. Even tell us if it helps.

Also be prepared for the stages of grief. I think this will happen as it does when any close relationship shifts so drastically. Don't be like me. I got all caught up in anger. Although you're the one moving right? My T retired. I was so angry at her for that.

I will be thinking of you Hummingbird and no matter where you move to you will still have us.

(((HB))) This must be painfully hard, and I am sure bitter sweet as you must be so proud of how far you've come and to have shared such a powerful,extraordinary journey with your T. I have a lump in my throat and pounding in my chest for you.

I can imagine this will be quite a grieving process for a while, but I am sure you will be quite preoccupied with the move for a time.

It's funny HB, you are moving to a different location and I almost feel a tinge of a dear friend moving away, and you are not moving away from me at all. Huh, kinda strange isn't it? At least I hope this wouldn't mean good-bye here. I mean... (this is the Internet JM, get yourself together woman!) -sorry. I think what it is, is my T is leaving for a week and I will not have any access to her whatsoever. She will not be able to call in and acces her messages from where she is going. *gulp* So perhaps I have a lingering sadness overlapping into your experience. This must sound crazy, huh?

I didn't mean to make this about me. I am sad for you and yet I hope new and good things are awaiting you in your new location. I am happy that you will be having telephonic sessions. He sure sounds like a great T. No wonder you will miss him. But you will always have a part of him to carry around with you. At least that is how my T descibes it. It's a connection you will both always share and keep close in your hearts. (A heart light if you will)

I don't know what this will be like for you during the moving process, but I hope you are able to check in here frequently so we can help you through this transition.

Your friend,
JM

HB,

I'm not sure what to say, other than I'm sure you'll be OK. Will you be seeing a new T in your new location? I sure hope we don't lose you here on the board. Your feedback is priceless.

In any case, I'm sure the next little while might be tough, as you say, but with the insight you have I'm sure you have more than enough tools to get through it.

JM, I will also be without my T next week. We can commiserate if you'd like.

Russ

HB

You are such a bright light of hope for me. I don't know how long you have been on this journey, but it is obvious that you have worked very hard and you have really figured it out for yourself. Your inner peace shines through in your words and proves that there really is another side to this long tunnel that all of us are floundering through.

I hope that your move is as smooth as it can be and I really look forward to hearing all about it from you. My thoughts are with you as you enter this new time in your life. I know that whoever gets to know you in your new town, will be truly lucky. And as JM said, you will carry your T with you wherever you go.

PL

quote:

We have dismantled some of the fear that was holding me back from experiencing the joy of feeling and engaging wholeheartedly in life, both the good and the bad bits of it.

HB
This is the place where I want to land. Right now I can't see how or if I will ever get there, but I know that my T is working hard for this same goal. Every time I see her, I know that just a small piece of that fear gets whittled away, but there is still a huge chunk of it left. I guess when I look back to where I was before I met her 2 yrs. ago, I can see the progress. It just seems that the distance to the end is so far away. Probably best that I don't look at it that way. Better that I take one day at a time.

PL

((((((((HB)))))))))))

I'm glad that you and your T were able to make that connection so deeply and take the time to look back and honor when you arrived at an ending. I had my T of 17 years retire and I know what a bittersweet experience it is. To recognize all your progress and the role you both played in it and how much the relationship meant to both of you is to rejoice in what you had together. But it is sad, and sometimes painful, to have to say goodbye.

I want to encourage you that I very much carry my old T with me. She is very interwoven into who I am and although I am no longer in contact with her, she is very much a part of my life and an important one at that. I know that wherever she is and whatever she is doing, our relationship is still a very real one and that we care deeply about each other.

quote:

I suspect the next few days might be a bit bumpy for me, i feel like i am losing something very special and while i am okay today, i am not so sure how tomorrow will be

I think you are very wise to be aware of this. I did have to work through grief and anger and sadness over her leaving. But here's the thing;it is an ending that deserves some sadness. Your T is important to you and changed your life in such significant ways that feeling sad when you leave is honoring all the value in that relationship and the esteem in which you held him.

I know that you're going to be more than fine and all the stronger for coming through this. And please come and talk about however you're feeling. I wish the distance were not so great between us but am grateful there is a way to bridge it. And that you have a geek to make it happen for you. Please thank him for me!

AG