(((((AprilK)))))

Hey, HOW courageous of you to reach out for the help you need!! Well done you! Remember you are among many friends here too.

I sincerely and genuinely hope that you'll get a lot of helpful and supportive responses to your post, and I'm sure you will.

People with far more knowledge and wisdom than I will surely post more useful and eloquent responses than mine; but there are a few things I'd like to comment on.

We are ALL different, we are ALL unique; every single one of us; and we are all different from 'the rest' just as they are different from us; all on our own unique life paths. But no matter how individual we are; we are ALL worthy and valued people. The hard but true fact is that we come into this world alone and we leave this world alone, and in between we are unique individuals.

quote:

I always liked being different

That's great to hear you say that. A lot of people strive to achieve just that and you ought to give yourself a pat on the back for that!!

I certainly I don't smile all the time either! Sometimes I get scared, or irritated or angry; we all do. We are allowed to; it's all part of living, and just because we feel that way sometimes doesn't make us any less worthy or loveable.

quote:

I love myself

That's fantastic. I'm having to see my T just to get to where you already are!! because if you don't love yourself first then who else is going to? It sounds like you are doing a lot of the right things already.

As long as YOU don't think you are boring and sad; then no-one else is going to think that way about you.

From your previous posts I understand that finding a T at the moment is difficult for you, and i'm hoping that members here will be able to pass on some of the lessons they've learned from their T's to you.

Do keep posting on here, and ask for all the help you need.

AV.

hi aprilk

i could have written your post word for word and at different stages in my life too so wanted you to know that you were not the only one out there who has and does feel all these things...that you were being heard here. you say you love yourself and being different, if only i was ok with being different perhaps i would not be as old as i am and in therapy for two years and counting. its hard sometimes to see ourselves as different or not fitting in with the 'others' as we see the others around us because that highlights to us how different we feel. i struggle with feeling different every day because of my experiences, and also i do struggle with difference in a studying situation that i am in...my t is beginning to help me see its ok to be different there because i am in therapy..so have a bigger understanding of theory and practice issues involved in the area i am studying..we are still working on that

you say quite clearly you are ok in being different and thats a good thing you know if only i was at that stage..i think its also a positive in your post that you can recognise and name some of the feelings you are having

you say you feel that you can not approach your friends and thats so understandable as sometimes feelings can be so many at one time its hard to know where to start...and then its like what if my feelings turn them away etcera.

if you are in college (school) is there anyone there like a counsellor you could talk to and make a start on some help, it wont be easy to do. that may seem too hard at the moment so please ignore it if it is. but you have made a step in reaching out and joining here you know and thats something to be okay with

try and be gentle with yourself (not easy at the best of times)

pingu

(((APRILK)))

I can totally relate to just about everything you said. I've always felt different though, unlike you, only ever wanted to be like everyone else.

I still have trouble in a lot of areas but lately I've noticed that I'm finding the common ground with others instead of the differences. For instance, I am 49 years old. I just started a new job and have worked with a 21 year old male and a 25 year old male. What the heck would I have in common with them? I couldn't believe it when I found that they both had similar life experiences as me. It was just enough to establish a common ground and help me feel more comfortable being around them. They aren't going to be my best friends but the conneciton helped me to feel less isolated.

Hang in there. Are you still going to therapy?

(((((AV)))))
Thank you AV, it did take a lot in me to write this!!

quote:

We are ALL different, we are ALL unique; every single one of us; and we are all different from 'the rest' just as they are different from us; all on our own unique life paths. But no matter how individual we are; we are ALL worthy and valued people. The hard but true fact is that we come into this world alone and we leave this world alone, and in between we are unique individuals.

You are right AV. I understand it

quote:

We are allowed to; it's all part of living, and just because we feel that way sometimes doesn't make us any less worthy or loveable.

This line took a great bit of load off me!!

quote:

As long as YOU don't think you are boring and sad; then no-one else is going to think that way about you.

Well i don't think 'I' am boring or sad because i know how to keep myself happy. i just keep thinking what am i in the eyes of others, or rather assume it to be this and then ruin it for me!

Yes, i don't have a T! I can get my help only from all of you and i am so grateful for your reply!
Thank you

(((((Pingu)))))
It is so good to be heard!! It gives me some hope!

[QUOTE]i struggle with feeling different every day because of my experiences, and also i do struggle with difference in a studying situation that i am in...my t is beginning to help me see its ok to be different there because i am in therapy..so have a bigger understanding of theory and practice issues involved in the area i am studying..we are still working on that

I truly hope you get past your difficulties soon

Yes it can be difficult but replies like these make it so much easier for me!
Yes i am in college but we don't have a councellor here. I rely on this forum

Thank you Pings for your kind words. And i hope you find your path too

(((((Liese)))))

I am sorry that you go through such difficulties too, but reading more on what you said i understand that you come out of it in a good way and that is lovely!!

This does give me some inspiration and makes it easier for me

I don't have a T but i think i can handle myself for now and get a grip on things
This forum is so very helpful for that!!