Hi,
I often send e-mail to my T. She works in a hospital clinic and has the computor on all day so she reads and replies in between patients.
When I change to her private clinic when she goes on maternity leave she has a business e-mail, but she will only work one day a week , increasing to 2 days after a few months. I have asked about e-mailing and she has said it is ok, but to bear in mind that she is at home with a 3 year old and a new baby so will most likely check e-mails in the evenings. She has a phone as well but realistically she cannot promise when she will be able to talk and has said e-mail is better.

Mudd, yes a lot of us here do text and email our T's from time to time.
T's will vary on what their policy is, but most don't want text and email to substitute for sessions. therapy can't be done that way, and it is actually better to discuss really pivotal issues in person so your T can get all the verbal and non-verbal cues that are missing in email and text and respond to you accordingly. Sounds like your T wants to protect your privacy and doesn't want to provoke more angst by not giving you a timely response. Hugs xx

((((MUDD)))

I am not allowed to text or email but I can call. I've never asked my T why he doesn't text or email but I suspect it's because of the reason your T gave you: he doesn't want my email to fall through the cracks. If I emailed him some vulnerable stuff and my T didn't respond or didn't respond quickly enough, it might cause me to go into crisis.

It's really important to my T that he respond timely and I know it would bother him if he knew I reached out to him and for one reason or another, he didn't get back to me soon enough. I think it gives my a certain amount of comfort to know if he hasn't received a phone message, then no one needs to talk to him. The phone is an immediate prompt, asking for attention. Email is something that he would have to check or think to check. As long as the phone isn't ringing, he knows none of his clients are in crisis or struggling.

I think it's great that your T was honest with you. There are some other pitfalls with email. It's easy to get sucked into an email conversation and they have to be careful about managing their time. It's also easy for us to write things down instead of saying them. I've handed my T notes in session when I was unable to speak but he was right there with me and we were able to process it in session.

Hope this helps!

hi mudd. my T gave me very limited email priviledges but that is only because whenever i did email him it would not be indepth material ... mostly scheduling type stuff. my T works alot with teenagers and he said there are times he would get VERY lengthy emails from anxious mothers and he would resent the fact that he felt compelled to thouroughly read the entire email in case there is some mention of the child being suicidal or something. he much prefers face-to-face contact. he didn't like the lack of security of emailing, either. i guess it's really a personal preference thing.

have you thought about sending something snail-mail so he gets it before your next session, or writing it down and giving it to him at the start of your session? that's my Ts preference, and i think others have done that as well.

i don't think it's a smoke screen. i think it's his personal comfort level and he is trying to protect you in case he can't get back to you in a timely manner.

(((MUDD))

quote:

have you thought about sending something snail-mail so he gets it before your next session, or writing it down and giving it to him at the start of your session? that's my Ts preference, and i think others have done that as well.

I've sent things by snail mail. One time it took the snail 10 days to get a letter to T's office. That one had an issue with the large, label-sized stamp that I accidentally purchased from the stamp machine. The others got there in 1 day.

T does allow me to do email. When I'm in school it's usually for appt changes but sometimes if I can't say something n person, Ill email it to her and we usually talk about it next session. When I go home for breaks I use email too but not as often. I've been in a good place for a while so I don't feel too needy for her while I'm away. Of course I do have my moemnts so it's always nice to ask for a phone session which she graciously gives

I think I am in a seemingly unique position with my T... She runs her own business and is not part of a larger organization... For the first year and a bit that I saw her, texting never entered the equation, as I did not have her cell number. A few months ago, she changed offices and now uses her cell phone as a primary contact - One day she texted me with a scheduling issue, and that opened the lines for that tool. I would never text her to just say hello..But I have texted her with an exciting piece of news, or to ask if it was okay to call -Which I felt gave her more of a warning than just calling.

In general, she is fine with email and will only respond if i ask her to - Otherwise we have a mutually agreed upon arrangement where I can email her if I need to get something off my mind and journalling about it without emailing seems to make it worse.

I feel incredibly lucky that my T is open to outside communication.

No texting, no e-mailing, no phone calls...the latter only allowed if it has something to do with appt. changes.