((Closed Doors))

Sorry you have to stop therapy right now.

I can empathize with you about the fantasy.
I have this fantasy every single day of my life... especially about ex-t coming back and telling me that it was all a dream.. wake up..

I'm still waiting...

I can understand that feeling because my family ran into financial difficulties shortly after I started seeing my P. I told him I couldn't afford to come for a while and wasn't sure when I'd come back and we had really just started connecting.

I think I hoped he would make some sort of offer to reduce fees temporarily, or look into ways to bill my insurance company in a different way to help reduce the co-pay. He didn't offer anything, but said to try to come back when I could, even while my husband was unemployed.

I didn't return until my husband found a job and he did seem happy to see me when I returned, but the issue of money has a way of making me feel like I'm experiencing therapy in a totally different way than he is.

I think they really aren't supposed to talk us into staying because it may seem as if they are trying to meet a need, but it's hard, and I'm sorry you are going through this.

(((Closed Doors)))

I'm so sorry you are going through this, and I think your feelings of wanting your T to ask you to stay are so understandable, so normal. Of course you want him to ask you to stay - it's a relationship, and if it needs to take a break, it's not because you WANT to, it's because you have to, and it makes sense that you would want him to want you to stay.

Is there any way he could reduce the rate so you could keep attending?

I'm so very sorry, but I hope that if you do take a break, that you can get back very quickly.

I wish my T would talk me in to all kinds of stuff... but I have a naturally defiant nature about me sometimes, too. I grew up under a mix of too little and then too much direction/connection to a pattern or outcome.

I'm SO sorry you will need to quit therapy If your T knows you can't say no.. that's even more likely he will not talk you in/out of anything... but he is there to help you process through, look at options if you want to look at options. But if it's not possible it's not possible. I really truly understand that either way it is going to hurt - if he does or doesn't try to talk you in to it. But I'm hoping he might say that he will see you when you can afford it again, that he would love to continue seeing you - something like that. It's a very touchy subject ethically, I believe. He may be able to reduce is fee if he does a sliding scale so that may be work asking about also.



Thinking of you, and so sorry about this.

closed doors, I went through this in the spring. I told my T I probably couldn't attend anymore because of finances and she jumped in right away and said she would greatly reduce her fee. I only go once a month anyway and really didn't want her to have to reduce her fees because I felt that might get in the way of therapy. That was just my worry, but I have a hard time opening up as it is and I know that if I wasn't paying full pop it would seem like I was wasting her now cheaper time.

I got a part-time job that basically covers her once a month fee. It is very hard to only go that infrequently, but it is better than nothing. I hope you can find some resolution to your situation, so that you can continue on some basis. Good luck.

((((CLOSED DOORS))))

It sucks that you have to quit therapy because of money issues. I would want the same thing you want. I'd want T to be upset that I'm leaving and ask me to stay especially since you are not leaving due to a conflict. It seems to me that that would be a "normal" desire in a "normal" relationship. This whole therapy business does get weird around the money issues. It's tough and it hurts when the reality that this is a business for them comes to the forefront. Maybe you could talk to your T about your feelings? Be upfront about how part of you wants him to ask you to stay even though it would hurt you financially? But if he doesn't ask you to stay, your feelings will be hurt?

i read all this shortly after my original post and couldn't make myself respond. i just want to let you know that all of your replies touched me deeply and i felt SO much less alone. so thank you all (((( HUGS ))))

((( brokes ))) i know some of your story and i just want to say that i hope someday you can get some resolution with what happened.

((( Summer ))) i'm sorry you were forced into quitting when you didn't want to. that sucks. yeah, it's nice to fantasize that you'll get the response you're hoping for, but such a big ouch when you don't get what you want. i know they can't really talk us into staying. i know there's some kind of boundary or some malpractice thing or something. it still is a cold hard reality. i would never expect my hair stylist to reduce fees, and if she ever tried to talk me into staying i'd probably run for the door. i know therapy is way different than getting haircut , but still a weird thing to ponder.

((( MMM ))) thanks for validating i think that's really why i posted. need to know i'm not alone in feeling that way.

((( Cat ))) thanks for the hug

((( Becca ))), i'm glad you were able to come up with a good solution. Thanks for your response, it means alot.

and last but not ((( Leise ))) (sorry ... couldn't resist ) thanks for understanding. yeah, you're right about the money thing, and money happens to be one of my big issues. thanks for your input.

i am reducing the frequency of therapy for now. i see myself as needing too much to give up now. and i don't think i could ever start over ever again. trust and opening up are just too hard. had our first session after a month off and it was a really, really good session. T brings it all home and i shoulda known he would.

you guys, thanks so much for all your caring replies. it means so much.