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to make it short: I am going on vacation for about 10 days. In my session today i was anxious because of this trip i am going to. I am dealing with both seperation angst from T, whom i`been seing 3 session pr week in the latest months- and my "normal" struggle with very strong feelings for my T. (oh btw: My T is a strict with boundaries and wont share any private stuff with me!) The following doesnt make it easier:

15 minuts ago, my mom called. She was asking me if she and my dad could sleep over at my place, as thei were going into the city, next week. i said yes of course, and asked why they were comming to town-.... she then hesitated a bit, but answered: ) "we have been invited over to X`s (that IS MY T!!!) house for a gathering.."(!!!) Eeker Confused

what the f??????!!!!!!!

i am comming home just that date from my trip, and will be meeting them here at my place, and my parents will appearently come straight from MY T`s "party" or whatever... i will hate it. that they wont share with me all the suff i WANNA KNOW about my T, the house, the people there, what they spoke of and so in..
what am i suppose to feel about this? is it ok for them to hang out like this??

OK. i TRIED TO BE CALM ABOUT IT BUT I AM SOOOOOOOOO CONFUZED and i have no idea how to react!!! what would you people think of as a proper reaction to your folks involving with your t??? i am totally jeleaous of my own parents and angry at the same time.. yet feeling confuzed and..gosh..i dunno.

WHY DIDNT MY T BRING IT UP THIS SESSION??? he has obviously invited them, to his private home, and he just sat there listening to me, while i actually was talking a great deal about my parents there today! Shouldnt he have brought it up?

...arrg..it happens every time. i really wonder how you would have reacted to such a "boundaries-touchy" stuff..??
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thanks for the quick reply- needed that! And thanks for actually REACTING on this DF- on my behalf as well, it helped!

oh, yeah, i am glad you mentioned this.(cant believe how you remembered i mentioned this!)

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I know you said your parents and T are colleagues but still... holy cow. Is there any way you can call or T, or will you see your T again before you go?
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I wont see him before i leave. I am heading towards Jerusalem early tomorrow, and return late next friday. Thats when this "dinner/party" or whatever will take place at my T`s house. damn. You right though.. my parents ARE actually great, and my T as well, and i did knew thei were colleagues when i started in therapy...it was my folks that adviced me to contact my T and they do are aware of this spescial context and propably also aware of how this might effect on me.. thats propably why my parents wont talk to me much about my T. They wont "disturb" the relaion with my T, i guess... still, THIS DOES! BIG TIME!

.. i am simply jelaous. And going a bit insane about imagining them together.. as you understand Smiler

no waY i will contact my T about this though... i hate brinGin`this up because i always end up getting the "silent treatment" if so. and me neither wanna "interupt" or come across as this patient whom make things more complicated and dramatic than it has to be, yo`no?

...and for some reason it hurts that i know for sure my T wont bring this up next session.
I love what you call your "rambling" Big Grin and also that you actually find this situation interesting..lol, you sound like my T! (he alaways seem to find my stuff as "hmm...interesting!" Wink)

Yes, thanks again for your understanding. The situation IS complicated. Guess you`re right about my T didnt mention it, because he doesnt think it`s up to him to tell. in a way i agree with him.. and not. but neither my parents thinks its up to them to mention this! As if its not something i have the right to know about.. I DO WANNA KNOW EVERY DAMN DETAIL!
Since my Parents are also therapists i am sure those 3 (my T and my folks) never mention me when they meet, (i KNOW thei dont, they are very aware of this things and always been respectful about it.) but i do imagine it anyway.. and i refuse to believe it is all "natural" to them when they meet, It MUST be odd for them to hang out? SERIOUSLY, how do they manage to act all normal about it? -to talk about anything but me, y`no? (i bet you do)or am i totally giving my self a much bigger role in all this- than i really have?? maybe they dont think of me at all... hmm. that sucks too.


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What do you wish you could do about it??
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I`d transeform into my mom, go to the party, talk to my T whole night, ask him out about his personal life, (and about his patient *frog*)sheck out every room in the house, spie on his friends, finish my wine and than drink his wine and kiss him goodnight! Big Grin

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