(((Brokes)))

At least this forum can be your surrogate electronic collective attachment figure for now :-P

((BROKES))) - You have got MEEEEEEEEEE. And everyone here.


I get what you are saying, it feels like you are in no man's land.

Brokes - I WOULD email new T. Write to her everyday if you have to - make it like a diary. Tell her exactly what you wrote here. She will learn a lot about you from your emails before you guys even start therapy. Me writing to T helped me connect with her - it was a very vital connection. Your T has said you can email her - so I think you should.

If in doubt, Email her. Says Somedays.

(((Unbroken)))

Ditto what Alpaca said.

(((((UNBROKEN)))))

It's a hard time for a change. Here's hoping the next couple of weeks go fast for you.

xoxo

Liese

(((((((Brokes)))))))
Ditto Alpaca and everyone else - we are here!
This is a bummer time for a gap in therapy - heck, any gap is tough. I think Somedays is right too, emailing new T would be good. Or what about typing out things to share with her in the future? I write letters to my T a lot and then bring them into appointments. If you don't feel ok yet emailing new T, is there another way you can make sure she is still "there"? This might sound really stupid, but sometimes I look up my T on the yellow pages online... just to remind me that yep, she still exists. It isn't the same as getting an email or call from her, but it is something that helps me... I'm pretty weird though. Feeling alone is hard... I'm glad you came here to post. I like your little graphic - oh please save some room for me behind the couch.

hugs to you,
jane

Aww, you guys are the sweetest. I am going to use you all as my attachment figure until I get settled in with new T. That will feel good because I know there is A LOT of support here.

Thanks to you all for being so sweet. This is definitely not an easy time for me. and Jane, there is room enough for all of us behind that couch. The more the merrier.

--Brokes

Hi Unbroken, you are definitely not alone. We are all here and all ready to support you, to hold you up if needed and to provide a cheering section until (and even after) you get settled in with new T. I can really understand the limbo feeling you are experiencing. My current T has talked to me about letting go of oldT. He would like me to do that to some extent to make room for him and for the work to move forward. He tells me this when I complain that I feel stuck and unable to move in therapy. But I tell him I can't let go completely of oldT and he says I can but I may not be ready. I told him that I don't even know HOW to do that. Maybe it's too scary because if I let him go completely there will be this HUGE gaping hole of nothing where he used to be. My T assures me that we will fill this space with good things. I'm still not able to do this so I can understand how it feels for you.

I'm thinking of you and cheering you onwards toward your new T.

TN

((TN))

I think the thing that makes this forum so wonderful is sharing my deepest, darkest feelings and having someone like you say "Hey, I've been there and I know exactly what you are going through." It makes me feel less alone on this journey to know that others experience the same feelings I do.

I'm struggling with letting T go. I know that this is going to take some time, as I am not sure if I have ever really let anyone go before. My first attachment was a teacher and I still feel a big ball of sadness when I think about losing her. T was my next attachment and I felt so warm and so safe with her. I know that my new T's heart is in this, but I still keep going back to the whole---well, she's NOT OLD T!! I kind of have promised that I'd give new T a fighting chance. BUT, I still wonder if I will get ANGRY at her for trying to replace old T.. I can see some resentment building there. I am not sure, though? This is all so new to me.

Thanks for being there. It means A LOT to me.
--Brokes

I bet you probably will get angry at New T for a while for not being your old one. But that is OK I think and not something to be too worried about. Getting angry at my T last week and seeing how nonreactively she dealt with it actually increased my trust in her a lot.