Keep breathing and you will get through it. And I think it will be worth it.

Thanks BLT.

Well I made it through the session but it was soooooooooo uncomfortable. Both DH and I are avoidant personality types. I had told this to T a long time ago but I don't think she realized just how much we were. She really had to work to get us to talk. She is trained in Imago therapy. There is a specific dialog that she uses in my individual sessions and has couples do. So she had us do this dialog where I had to send information first, then DH had to mirror back what he heard to make sure he got it right. It went well but T was pressuring me to share things that I don't want to share. She kept my turn going a long time trying to get me to share more. I was begging for it to be his turn. I'm not good at vulnerability. I know that is necessary for real intimacy but it is so uncomfortable!

Overall I think it was a good thing to do. It has opened the door for us. I told DH how lonely I feel often. He is willing to go to therapy to learn new skills. So all seems well for the time being.

T and I will process next week and decide if/when to schedule another couples session. I really miss my individual session with her so I'm not sure how often I want to give that up.

I can't imagine sharing my T with H. When H and I went to couples, we had to get a different T (my T won't see any of my family members though anyway). You are brave. Sounds like you are both thinking it is a good thing. I actually kind of miss going to couples-T myself, .... I actually didn't like her, but she irked me enough to show my 'real self' LOL

Hope you'll share more of your sessions with us.

((JILLIAN)))) You really do sound very brave to make yourself so vulnerable, and you got through it. I also think it is so great that DH is willing to go to Therapy and learn new skills. Really sounds like a win-win situation. You said it all when you mentioned that "It is necessary for real intimacy, but its so uncomfortable". Thank You for being such a great example for all of us on this forum.