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Ok so I need someplace to vent about my classes. Cause the last time I was this upset with my (so-called) professor, I sent her an email (very professionally written) but it started a bad back and forth email chain that left me even more frustrated in the end. Mad

This time I TRULY believe the EVIL BEEEEETCH is retaliating against me. She is supposedly a doctor, has a phd and makes us all refer to her as Dr. Professor.

But she writes with the coherence of a comatose snail. Her email responses where completely ridiculous, and once it because clear to me she was angered by my words, I apologized (for having done nothing wrong btw) and ended the conversation.

So the next assignment has been graded and this is the comment she left me:

"Forlorn:
No one asked what you thought, if you agreed, or your opinion."

WTH B****!

At several points in other comments she put exclamation points. Excuse me if I'm wrong, but the use of exclamation point is to indicate extreme excitement or yelling. She definitely was NOT excited, so why the F is she yelling at me?

BTW, this is a master's program. and an Intro level class at that.

I think it is REALLY unprofessional for her to take offense at me for standing up for myself in a previous assignment and then to basically belittle me throughout future assignments.

And of COURSE, AS FRICKIN ALWAYS, I am powerless to stop her. She's just another mean Woman in my life pushing me around without any regard for couth, etiquette, professionalism, educated thought...

GAH! and the whole scenario has me flashing back to evil ex-T who labeled me and pretended like everything was my fault and did not acknowledge my accusations of her. And then of course of meanie-mom who I could never do or be good enough for. Now this so-called Dr. Professor is berating me and never satisfied with my work. And she thinks she has to yell at me because I'm too think-headed to grasp regular words.

Sorry for the lack cohesion in this post. I am really VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY angry.

If you guys could see those emails and other comments you'd understand, but trust me they are bad.

I even showed the emails to T and said "seriously, tell me the brute honest truth, and don't be biased, am I off-base with this?"
And T said the emails from Miss wannabe Dr.Professor were completely off and not only Didn't address my question appropriately, they were snide and deliberately abitrary.

I just worry about having future courses with this woman. In that event, I will drop the course and switch profs if I have to. This is bad bad bad.

To her it probably means nothing, but to me it feels like a very personal ATTACK.

And this last assignment did not say to NOT state our opinions. It was an exercise on paraphrasing and I happen to be a very opinionated paraphraser.

Gah! Maybe I am totally in the wrong for this though. Her words are very very triggering to me. "no one asked you what you thought" probably didn't mean anything to her. Probably tells hundreds of students that without a worry. But for me, who of course, no one cares what I think, No one ever asks me what I'm thinking, THIS is soo hurtful you guys! Am I totally off-base?

Frowner
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quote:
She's just another mean Woman in my life pushing me around without any regard for couth, etiquette, professionalism, educated thought...

GAH! and the whole scenario has me flashing back to evil ex-T who labeled me and pretended like everything was my fault and did not acknowledge my accusations of her. And then of course of meanie-mom who I could never do or be good enough for.



forlorn, yes, we are related...i know, i saw a bumper sticker today that said "I will try to be NICER if YOU will try to be SMARTER"...does that fit!!???

the beeeeaaaach!

i dunno, sometimes i know i lay low (as a kid) just to not receive any more damage to my psyche than i already have, and then, when i stand up, i get a big hand slap. i haven't found the middle ground...either. so i have no advise for you here. i don't know the middle. but i find life safest like a turtle, all tucked in, head included. so, you know my advise wouldn't be useful. but, if misery loves company, pour me a beer, coz i am right there with you. the problem is, the world has just a few too many morons in it...sounds like DR. PROFESSOR (how ridiculous is THAT for a name) and my ex t are related as well!!! the bitch (mine) said something to the effect to my husband in my 'free' termination meeting (one more psyche-bashing session 'on the house' as if my ego wasn't fully crushed yet!) that i don't trust women and i think they are conniving and will 'turn on you' in an instant...AS IF SHE WAS DISPROVING THAT THEORY!! i had to laugh at the ridiculousness of her argument....talk about the pot calling the kettle black!! geez!!! GROW A BRAIN!!!

sorry to add my rant to your own, but, they sound related!! and you are NOT off base. that is disrespectful to say to anyone. and others may APPEAR to be able to brush it off better, and without the background of neglect, maybe they can, but that is NOT how another human talks to another...ESPECIALLY in the authority role. it is one thing if you are the 'child' in the relationship, to make an error, but not the 'caretaker/authority' figure. i tend to make matters worse either hand i play, so i would love to read someones advice here.

someone else could better advise you, i just am your sister in RAGE at BITCHY WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! jill

((and YES, i know i don't know how to spell advise/advice...that is just how foreign that word is to me))
Forlorn, I don't think you are off-base at all. However, I think I get why you would even ask yourself that question. People like this are so incredible that you don't want to believe they are for real. I see it as an abuse of her power and authority; naturally that would be triggering. It sounds like an ego thing for her. She holds the cards and knows she can get away with it, right? She surely has her own set of problems that have nothing to do with you. It is unfortunate you have to deal with her. It is these kind of people which intimidated me into dropping out of school many years ago because I had zero confidence or ability to stand up and believe in myself. Just last week I finally registered for school again and all these same insecurities are now flooding back. I don't want to fail this time around, but I know I'm going to get triggered too.
Hi Forlorn,

You have every right to be completely angered and hurt by how your professor has handled this. Her comment seems harsh just in general, but I can see how triggering it could be, as I know I would be triggered as well. I can only imagine how it would feel to be faced with whatever else she said to you. Also, I don't think it matters if she says that to tons of other students; she shouldn't say anything like that to anyone, because it is callous and screams intolerance and impatience.

I would be right there with you in avoiding any other courses with her. Also, I have no clue if it helps at all, but I think it's really good that you're able to be angry about this and not be stuck in the plain hurtful part, as I know I would be. It sounds like a really demoralizing experience, and I think you're handling it really well considering the circumstances. How far into the course are you?
I’m sorry, Forlorn. I know, it really sucks to have to deal with people like this. I think you are totally in the right, just with the fact that she is supposed to be the authority in the situation, but that comment she left you, WOW! That’s just rude.

I had this one teacher senior year of high school who sounds almost exactly like the teacher you are dealing with. I know for a fact that she had personal issues with me, and at the end of the year we got in a really big fight. She completely tore me apart and I didn’t stand up for myself. (I couldn’t because I was heavily addicted to adderall, and I could barely even talk normally most days). I am planning on going to community college in the fall and I’m having major anxiety about it. I know I will have to deal with people who tear other people apart just to make themselves feel better.

Like Mad Hatter said, when people act like that and abuse their authority it’s totally about them and not you- even though they try and make it seem like it’s about you. It’s just sad for them that they never learned. I hope that you are able to make it through the rest of the class remaining at least neutral with her, because it seems like people like this are never going to change or learn, so you end up just having to deal with them.

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