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spagirlspagirlMember
She has started drinking again.

"Just two glasses."

History has shown that she CANNOT handle even that much.

I have pleaded with her. It does no good. "I worked hard today and I wanted to come home and RELAX with some wine." Well, those "two glasses" are the beginning of losing the mother I was actually enjoying for the past couple of months.

I am so fucking sick and exhausted of this fucking drama. I just wrote to her via email and let her know in no uncertain terms, I am willing to be absolutely ALONE - rather than living with the effects of her "two glasses".

I just want to cry.

~
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spagirlspagirlMember
Do you know what sucks most about this? It was SO nice to have my MOTHER for two months. Now, as she begins the cycle again, that closeness and connection is lost. It was so nice to finally experience her without the snarkiness, meanness, criticisms, and trauma. Now I am dreading the next few months which are filled with birthday "celebrations", "family" holidays and the biggest dread of all CHRISTMAS. Just when you thought there was peace in the land, you realize it was only a dream.


I was wondering if there are any "Adult Children of Alcoholics" forums online? This has been such a source of comfort and help. Wonder if getting advice from others just like me would help me find strength to deal with this?

It's like I don't know what to do. I begin to feel very isolated. The person I want to reach to for support and kindness isn't there anymore - she's drowning in Chardonnay.

~

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