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11 replies

Going back into Lurkland

lamplighterlamplighterMember
Hello everyone. I’m sorry I’ve not been around very much - I seem to be finding it hard to find words and though I read everyone’s posts and want to reply, I end up just going blank.

I’m also struggling to be able to post about me - I’m trying to deal with non-verbal stuff in therapy and am finding that my usual mode of being in the world is actually counter-productive (think too much, talk too much, analyze too much) and that actually I don’t want to put into words (yet!) what’s going on for me.

On top of that my new T has (very nicely) suggested that being on forum (and reading and thinking about therapy per se) is not the best thing I should be doing at the moment. Not sure I agree with her but seeing as how I’m not able to do much posting anyway right now, and that it might be a good idea for me to have a bit of faith in what a T suggests - for a change! - I’m thinking that maybe I’ll take a step back from forum for now.

I shall still be lurking and am not leaving or taking a break as such - just wanted to let you know though that I won’t be posting as much as I used to.

So am taking this opportunity to thank everyone for the umpteenth time for being SO supportive and for making this forum such a great place to be. Hugs to you all.

LL
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strummergirlstrummergirlMember
Hi Lamplighter Big Grin

No hard feelings at all...I totally know what it's like not to be able to find the words. But that said...you have been, and will be, missed. Whether you are talking about your own stuff, or responding to others, you contribute so much to this community.

I'm happy for you to hear that this new T is working out so well...she is what you have deserved all along, and I just want to say again GREAT JOB for your perseverance in finding her. Big Grin And how interesting that you are entering the world of the non-verbal stuff in therapy...it sounds like new territory...and as far as what your T said...sometimes I've wondered something similar...like sometimes talking here means that I'm not giving my T a chance...not that I mean to do that, but sometimes it just works out that way...anyway what I mean to say is, I totally support your decision and think your T could really be on to something there.

Again I am SO happy for you that you finally found a T who hears and sees beautiful YOU and I wish you all good things in your therapy journey with her. And I will very much look forward to an update, when it is time and you are ready to do so. Big Grin

Love,
SG
frogfrogMember
Dearest Lamplighter

thank you for telling us this. Its both brave and very honest, i fully understand and respect your dection. I`d like to applaud the decition of taking a breake from forum now-..i am sure your T (and you) are doing whats best for you in suggesting this breake. I have great faith in your ability to find out what is most helpful for you now, and taking more time to focus on your self and not having to analyze and think/verbalize everything,- it sound like a good thing. So, no need to apologize for not posting on others threads, nor about your own therapy. i am just glad knowing that you are focusing on your own health and creds to you for following up your T`s suggestion on this Lamps.
love! ((((LL))))
L lieseMember
HI LL,

Haven't known you long but have come to care about you. Glad that you really like your new T. I, too, have wondered if coming on the forum is compromising my therapy but I haven't talked to my T about it yet to get his input. But I really respect your decision to step back and let the process work. Maybe you can just stop back once in a while to let us know how things are going?

Best wishes and HUGS,

Liese
blackbirdblackbirdMember
We will miss you, LL...but I think you are doing a great thing by trying something new out and see where it takes you....sometimes even the best things can end up not being helpful for us, where we are at right now, and I can completely understand and appreciate your decision. I have wanted to try the same thing out and see where it takes me, but I'm too weak! Big Grin I really like the sound of your T,

hugs, you will be missed, but come back anytime,

BB
Attachment GirlAttachment GirlAdmin
((((LL)))))

I don't know what makes me happier, knowing you have found a good T at last, or that you are taking such good care of yourself. Thanks so much for letting us know. And I agree with what others have said, that you will be very much missed. And welcomed back with open arms if down the road, you want to post again. I think it's really good, and also important, that you are trusting your T with this. Please take good care of yourself.

AG
starfishstarfishMember
Lampers

Of course we understand - that makes perfect sense, to look after yourself as you settle down with your new T. And it's hard to take on other peoples' worries sometimes when your battling to understand your own.

quote:
I’m trying to deal with non-verbal stuff in therapy and am finding that my usual mode of being in the world is actually counter-productive (think too much, talk too much, analyze too much) and that actually I don’t want to put into words (yet!) what’s going on for me.


I'm glad that your T has cottoned on to this, I was really shocked when my T told me years ago that I never ever told her how I felt. I hadn't realised that I hadn't....I saw then that I talked endlessly about thoughts but managed to carefully avoid any feeling stuff. That was the beginning of the painful side of therapy for me, but one that proved the most helpful. I can see why you need some you-time to concentrate on looking after yourself as you start to do this.

Glad you'll still be lurking though, come up to the campfire anytime you feel like some company, we'll save you a marshmallow Big Grin

starfishy
True NorthTrue NorthCo-moderator
Lampers... I remain beyond thrilled that you have found such a good and understanding and knowledgeable new T. I pray it continues to be that fulfilling and healing relationship that you have worked so hard and searched so long for.

On a selfish note, I will very much miss your posts as you were very helpful to me during my crisis and some of your words were very healing to me. You really did understand what I was going through and I feel sort of a kindred spirit to you in our joint searches for new Ts who can understand and help us heal.

I realize you must do what is the most healthy for you and what your T suggests. When you feel you can, please drop in and let us know how you are doing. We are here for you when you feel the time is right to return.

Hugs and best wishes,
TN

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